well, my most recently ejected-from-my-circle person has actually thrown themselves into categories of people that i feel nothing but disdain for: the emotionally weak, the self helpless. which only solidifies my opinion of them. i am therefore now stating that i stand on the correct side of the fence, and moving on now completely.
her thought once brought memories of happiness and sadness at her disappearance, now it only brings thoughts of pity, and malice. it is people such as her that i have a pure hatred for.
walked around the mall today, thinking to myself about some groups of people i dislike. this time around, i would argue with these people in my head, and it only fueled the anger. ive had very little dealings with them as i try my best to avoid. these people only bring about a strong desire to argue, if only to see them bury themselves in there own ignorance. these people do, in fact, include jehova's witnesses and any other christian evangelists. usually, i can be pretty restricted to tell them politely to just... go away.
but every once in awhile, there is something personal involved. i have tried to ignore the facts, and decided to see just how far the depths of their ignorance stretches. in this most recent case, the depths were unimaginable. and i have not yet even acted on my malice or my disdain, merely my curiosity. if my curiosity alone can drive someone away in pain, their strength is lacking even further than i could've realized.
call me a scientist, or a mean psychologist. i believe that they feel absolutely nothing for me, then i will be more than happy to plunge myself into their pain if only for learning.
my demon is strong, and now that i have control of him, i can only feel remorse for the next person that gives me the chance to unleash it. i need a gun to shoot at the range. i need a punching bag to beat. yet these wont diminish my demon's rage, for it is in words. my demon does not throw punches, he attacks the weak points of a person. the places that will hurt worse than any physical wound could. i should have unleashed it. maybe ill just write it out. most likely won't post it though, its pretty personal and i at least can give a person that respect.
the comfort of revenge will come to them by their own hands. i just wish i could be there to witness the fall, it will be epic and brutal.
RANDOM NOTE:
i find it strongly annoying that my spell check if nails "christian" because its not capitalized. when was that honor ever deserved by those who claim that title? even i didn't capitalize it when i considered myself one.
hahaha
