iggy

I figured out the other day that I am going through what I call a "quarter life crisis", assuming that I live to be a hundred. Feeling old at twenty five is no fun. I know in my logical brain that, numerically speaking, I am still young, but I can't help but feel old as dirt. I know its this new weight of responsibility that has come into my life thats making me feel this way. What it all boils down to is that I am having trouble with this new role I have taken on.

It doesn't help that I can't seem to think outside of the box when it comes to myself. I feel like all of the sudden I have to shed who I am and start wearing mom jeans. You know, those jeans made out of second rate denim with the ridiculously high waistlines. That I have to have normal hair now, no more mohawks, no more chelseas, no more dying my hair pink on a whim. Le sigh le sigh.

Should I stop wearing my studded bracelet? Should I even think about attempting to shoot another set?

This saddens me. I feel like I have to give up who I am.

I don't miss the coke and desperation, I just miss me.

And now for something completely different...

Being the day late, dollar short kind of person that I am I just heard the latest Interpol and Radiohead albums today. I must say I am pleasantly surprised by the Interpol album. I was highly skeptical of its quality based on two factors 1) I wasn't all that fond of Antics 2) they switched to a major label. But my assumptions were way off the mark and I think its pretty awesome. The Radiohead album I wasn't skeptical of, in fact, I have a firm belief that Radiohead could never ever put out a bad album. Ever. I just hadn't heard it yet because I am lazy.

I have started to exercise every day. A few more pounds and I will look better than I did before I was pregnant. I like exercising. It gets rid of my excess energy and keeps me from feeling like a couch potato. That and I have an extreme fear of being overweight. I used to say I was really only afraid of two things 1) going to jail and 2) getting fat. Now since I don't do illegal things anymore I don't have to fear the possibility of going to prison, so I can concentrate all my energy on the other fear. Its not that I look down on people who are over weight, I don't at all. I'm just used to looking a certain way. That and I really don't want to have to buy all new sizes of pants and the like. I like my pants. I want to be able to wear them again.

And with that said Wolfgang needs a snack.