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i_poop_too_much

Austin, TX

Member Since 2004

Followers 1 Following 2

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Thursday Nov 18, 2004

Nov 18, 2004
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"Out of sight, out of mind-the motto of betrayel."

It's like the Matrix-everything is a lie.

I try to think about it, try to write about it, try to explain it, but I can't.

Codependance, needs "the best friend". Yet the "best friend" isn't good enough for codependance, and needs to be free to assign "best friend" to others.

So "Best Friend" was an assignment and not a rank. I'll never know, I'm "too important" (if I can beLIEve it) to be told the truth.

Selifsh child only thinks about what SHE loses or gains in any situation. Never any loss for anyone else.

It happens every time-if I try to build a life, it's collapses in on itself. I'm left with the same hole and lack of foundation with or without.

It was the last remnant of myself, and now I am hollow.

Dearest audience, in true Hollywood fashion, I've implemented the greatest setup:a ticking clock. Barring an accident, I've decided the day I shall die.

I'm so lost, I cant even find myself anymore.

You know, I used to like my eyes-I felt they were my only positive feature.

The DJ was on fire the other night-not neccesarily the best mix, but the continuity! Started with "Stacy's Mom", followed by "1985" (both songs could easily be about the same woman), followed by Marilyn Manson's "Tainted Love" (which came from a soundtrack for a movie lampooning the 80s flicks specifically mentioned in "1985")...then something else I cant remember...then that goddamned Trick Daddy rap cover of "Crazy Train"-at least that was followed by the REAL "Crazy Train".

In better news...."Nymphetamine" is the greatest word never invented.

Cold was my soul
Untold was the pain
I faced when you left me
A rose in the rain...

So I swore to the razor
That never, enchained
Would your dark nails of faith
Be pushed through my veins again

Fold to my arms
Hold their mesmeric sway
And dance out to the moon
As we did in those golden days
Christening stars
I remember the way

We were needle and spoon
Mislaid in the burning hay
Bared on your tomb
I am a prayer for your loneliness
And would you ever soon
Come above unto me?

Six feet deep is the incision
In my heart, that barless prison
Discolours all with tunnel vision
Nymphetamine

Sick and weak from my condition
This lust, this vampyric addiction
To Her alone in full submission
Nymphetamine

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