Login
Forgot Password?

OR

Login with Google Login with Twitter Login with Facebook
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • SuicideGirls
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
Vital Stats

i_am_ghost

Melbourne, Australia

Member Since 2004

Followers 136 Following 208

  • Everything
  • Photos
  • Video
  • Blogs
  • Groups
  • From Others

Saturday

Feb 8, 2014
0
  • Facebook
  • Tweet
  • Email

I've had a bad day.

The things of occurrence today weren't bad. It started off as any other Saturday would. I did the work I needed to do, a task that thankfully takes all of about 5 minutes now vs. the 2 hours it would take every Saturday and every Sunday when I first developed it. Some GTA V and some lunch. I had plans tonight to hang out with a friend, so I thought I might go out in to this heatwave business early and have a look around at shops. My justification was that I would be losing bits and pieces when she moves out, but the reality is that I wanted to fill my heart with possessions instead. So I bought a bed.

The plans were to see The Wolf of Wall Street. So we went to see it at Crown and I watched my friend lose $150 at the blackjack table pretty quickly before we watched some football in a sports bar before the movie. 3 hours later we went our separate ways.

As I walked to Flinders Street Station along the Yarra I felt overwhelmingly sad and lonely. Watching all of the people doing things. Wishing I could go and be a part of it all. A part of anything.

When I got home she was sitting in the driveway. She's been doing that a lot lately and I always assumed it was to give space and distance, to talk on the phone even. But she was doing that and I wasn't even there. The poor cat cries like crazy when she can hear her but can't see her. And the other night I had the worst sleep and was so angry that she could be such a cold, callous, selfish asshole to let the cat cry and to cause me to not be able to sleep, the sleep I need for my brain to function, the brain that is paying all of her bills still. I got the cat and I brought her in to my bedroom. She wouldn't crawl it to bed, so I just laid on the side of the bed with my hand on her to reassure her.

She came inside to have a shower while I lay on the lounge room floor and watched TV for a little while, only for her to go back outside straight afterwards. I've come to bed now without having seen her or saying goodnight.

I keep making random casual contact with people to try and connect but it isn't being reciprocated and I feel very alone.

facingforesight:
I know exactly how this feels being a ghost In your own home. This was the exact position I was in a 2 years ago before me and my now ex broke up a year later. I wish I could give reassuring words of some sort but I truthfully wouldn't know what to say, I know I'm stealing dealing with the same pain deep down some days. I hope every thing works for you. Your not alone
Feb 8, 2014
i_am_ghost:
Thanks @facingforesight
Feb 8, 2014

More Blogs

  • 05.05.15
    2

    Tuesday

    I just learned it isn't wise to try and maintain multiple Tinder co…
  • 04.08.15
    4

    Wednesday

    Cannot stop listening to this album. It's actually perfect. …
  • 02.26.15
    0

    Chemistry

    The hardest part to fix. In my overly-analytical mind, there are…
  • 02.25.15
    0

    Wednesday

    I saw Incubus tonight. My favourite band since I was 15. It was …
  • 02.18.15
    3

    So much #WCW

    Not much for these things but damn.. @bettierose. Just friggin look…
  • 01.30.15
    1

    I'm not saying I'm sexually attracted to my cat, BUT...

    Catchy title? Get your attention? BUT... I do like the part w…
  • 01.25.15
    0

    Sunday

    Dating is the pits. At what point is it acceptable to give up and b…
  • 01.03.15
    1

    Got my first tattoo on Monday

  • 12.14.14
    0

    I hate when there isn't an official video

  • 12.04.14
    2

    Thursday

We at SuicideGirls have been celebrating alternative pin-up girls for:

23
years
10
months
20
days
  • 5,509,826 fans
  • 41,393 fans
  • 10,327,617 followers
  • 4,599 SuicideGirls
  • 1,114,228 followers
  • 14,946,099 photos
  • 321,315 followers
  • 61,456,705 comments
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
  • Help
  • About
  • Press
  • LIVE

Legal/Tos | DMCA | Privacy Policy | 18 U.S.C. 2257 Record-Keeping Requirements Compliance Statement | Contact Us | Vendo Payment Support
©SuicideGirls 2001-2025

Press enter to search
Fast Hi-res

Click here to join & see it all...

Crop your photo