i_am_brucelee

Im in an extremely bad, foul tempered, disappointed, pessimistic, don't give a shit, kinda fed up with life mood. I'm sick of being out of money all the time. esp when my roommate is half living off of unemployment half working delivering pizzas and he makes/ constantly has more money than i do. its so infuriating. so ive been diving around on my spare tire because im pretty broke and i was waiting until today when i got paid to fix it. well saturday i was driving down to an artist's reception for me and my spare blew. well i literally had 215 dollars on me and it cost me 200 to fix the tire. come to find out my roommate bought 5 new tires that day for 800. and had money to spare. so im plodding along living off of 15 dollars and a few gift certificates i had and i got paid today. found out i won an auction on ebay i didnt want to win, couldnt afford it. (oops, i honestly thought i would be outbid...eek.) mentioned it and my rooommate says ill buy it. 50 more dollars there. then he tells me he won two auctions on ebay for 350 dollars more. what the fuck??? so he's spent almost 1200 dollars in less than a week and im stuggling to make my bills. fuck working man, im going to get a fucking pizza delivery job and collect unemployment. i would really like to know how some people live life with an optimistic attitude. all i see is shit around me. sometimes i think if it wasnt for my parents, i might have offed myself already.... jeez.