hypoxian

I was in town today. I saw a man in a clown suit passed out on the sidewalk. His dog sat by his side occasionally moving his eyes. The sun was warm despite it being the middle of winter. The smell of fish and coffee filled the streets as tourist crowded around the market. My sister went to buy flowers for her house and I sat on bench just outside. I couldn't help feeling that this was the best it will ever get. I have nothing to look forward too. She'll never come back, she won't call either. Who cares, no one is in charge of my feelings. My house is full of things but its still empty. I don't want to search for meaning, I just want someone I can call home. I want to live for someone. I want to die for someone. Nothing else matters to me right now. Even this rant really doesn't change anything. IT's so self serving, but who cares?