hyenahell

my brother knows exactly what song he wants played at his wedding. not that marriage looms decisively in his imminent future. it's just something he knows, like a favorite color or food. maybe it's his way of asserting some kind of control over uncertainty. as if, somehow, by supplying this constant to an event in the distant future- an event that probably will occur, but one which all variables (who, when, how, etc.) are undecided- as if by knowing what song he wants played at that moment makes it seem like something he has a choice about, not a random string of circumstances decided altogether by chance. in the same way, perhaps, i know exactly what song i want played at my funeral.

his is "tuesday's gone" by lynard skynard. mine is "you can't put your arms around a memory" by johnny thunders.

people have bizarre ways of finding order in a chaotic world...