i am home in Kentucky.
i never know how to feel about it. it's a mixture of nostalgia, loss, urgency and disdain. as far as emotional cocktails go, it's bittersweet and strong in a creeping-up-on-you kind of way.
but i get to see my dogs; my family; an old friend. so. that's all right, i suppose.
i don't have much to say. i think coming...
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i never know how to feel about it. it's a mixture of nostalgia, loss, urgency and disdain. as far as emotional cocktails go, it's bittersweet and strong in a creeping-up-on-you kind of way.
but i get to see my dogs; my family; an old friend. so. that's all right, i suppose.
i don't have much to say. i think coming...
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listening to an old mix tape i made back when i worked at the radio station. there's a song on it by the mad caddies, called "wierd beard". it's a pirate song. i forgot it existed. this has made me happy.
see you all in a week.
\ m /
-Hyena.
see you all in a week.
\ m /
-Hyena.
kudra:
You are scarrified? Recreationally, emotionally, or intentionally?
ninjagrrl:
MMMixtape. La, la, la.
I have nothing productive to say.
(^ ^) ng
I have nothing productive to say.
(^ ^) ng
""hungry as an archway, through which the troops have passed,
i stand in ruins behind you, your winter cloak and your broken sandal strap."
i am in an odd. odd. mood.
something like regret. regretful. but not of anything in particular.
no, it is not even wondering. not even. just... ?
i am going out of town. i'll be back. no update until then. well....
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i stand in ruins behind you, your winter cloak and your broken sandal strap."
i am in an odd. odd. mood.
something like regret. regretful. but not of anything in particular.
no, it is not even wondering. not even. just... ?
i am going out of town. i'll be back. no update until then. well....
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VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
uncognitive:
I read somewhere that self-awareness is the trait that separates human beings from other animals. There are times where I wish I could trade in my human self awareness for some cool animal traits like night vision, or the ability to comfortably lick my own genitals.
But have a good trip, have fun rocking out with the parentals and the dogs, update or email if you're near a computer and a phone line, if not, you'll be missed for a week.
But have a good trip, have fun rocking out with the parentals and the dogs, update or email if you're near a computer and a phone line, if not, you'll be missed for a week.
daem:
hey just wanted to say sorry i aint been around nor have i posted to you. but as always you are in my thoughts dear.
hello. this is your captain, Hyena, speaking. all aboard, all aboard.
i haven't slept more than eight hours in the past week. can't. damn medication. you'd think i'd wise up, eventually, and either stay off it or on it, and stop see-sawing back and fucking forth on the whacky ride that is anti-depressants. or maybe i should give up and start going back to the...
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i haven't slept more than eight hours in the past week. can't. damn medication. you'd think i'd wise up, eventually, and either stay off it or on it, and stop see-sawing back and fucking forth on the whacky ride that is anti-depressants. or maybe i should give up and start going back to the...
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uncognitive:
Fuck that casting off of mortal chains bullshit, everyone self-medicates themselves in some way. It's just a quest to find which form of self-medication, self-denial or self-delusion that doesn't fuck yourself or the people you run into too much. I'll let you know when I find mine.
But I hope you survived your bartending shift, and I can wait until you're back in balance before expecting another journal update.
Get some sleep and know that positive wishes are being beamed your way through the magic that is the internet.
But I hope you survived your bartending shift, and I can wait until you're back in balance before expecting another journal update.
Get some sleep and know that positive wishes are being beamed your way through the magic that is the internet.
lostomen:
Hiya Hyena. I like the profile pic.
Damnitall. I'm sorry you can't get any sleep. I know what thats like. Wish i could do something to actively help you.
Cant say i have cast of me chains either lass.
Such is life huh.
Oh sweet. You like Cemetary Man. I didn't think anyone else on this damn planet has seen that w00t! that just made my day. I just finished watching a movie called Dead Man with John Depp. It kicked ass. If you're in the mood to rent something different, rent that. It wont let you down.
Take care.
I truly hope stuff jumps back for you.
me thoughts are with ya hearty.
~L.O.~
Damnitall. I'm sorry you can't get any sleep. I know what thats like. Wish i could do something to actively help you.
Cant say i have cast of me chains either lass.
Such is life huh.
Oh sweet. You like Cemetary Man. I didn't think anyone else on this damn planet has seen that w00t! that just made my day. I just finished watching a movie called Dead Man with John Depp. It kicked ass. If you're in the mood to rent something different, rent that. It wont let you down.
Take care.
I truly hope stuff jumps back for you.
me thoughts are with ya hearty.
~L.O.~
i am officially broke.
it's good that i work tomorrow.
did a ridiculous lone pub crawl this morning. small girl trucking through the back streets of uptown at 4 a.m. not wise. but mace in hand, of course. didn't have to use it. although i don't know that i had anything to steal, and i am sure i looked it. poor transcends skin color or...
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it's good that i work tomorrow.
did a ridiculous lone pub crawl this morning. small girl trucking through the back streets of uptown at 4 a.m. not wise. but mace in hand, of course. didn't have to use it. although i don't know that i had anything to steal, and i am sure i looked it. poor transcends skin color or...
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bleh:
lone pub crawls aren't good for you 
uncognitive:
I also found that not showering for a few weeks and wearing the same clothes also kept the muggers away. At least that's how I got through living in a crack-friendly neighborhood in my younger years.
At least you have a reason to walk places. Losers like me who don't drink would just have the walking, and what's a pub crawl without the pubs?
Gotta run...drop me a comment sometime, and I hope you get huge amounts of tips tonight.
At least you have a reason to walk places. Losers like me who don't drink would just have the walking, and what's a pub crawl without the pubs?
Gotta run...drop me a comment sometime, and I hope you get huge amounts of tips tonight.
i got up this morning, yeah... but then i proceded to sleep. all day. hmmm. i told you i was worhtless if i didn't have my coffee. so. i blame society... yeah. society made me what i am today...
takin' the dog to the vet, now. that's gonna set me back the last of my week's cash, i think. which means i can't go to...
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takin' the dog to the vet, now. that's gonna set me back the last of my week's cash, i think. which means i can't go to...
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bleh:
how's the puppy? and i hope your spiderbite is still under control too..
uncognitive:
I blame society, and that rat bastard Juan Valdez for getting me hooked on coffee in the first place.
I hope your dog is okay, and that your festering spider bite doesn't actually turn out as unpleasant as "necrotic festering spider bite" sounds like.
But sleep in for me, since I need the rest.
I hope your dog is okay, and that your festering spider bite doesn't actually turn out as unpleasant as "necrotic festering spider bite" sounds like.
But sleep in for me, since I need the rest.
i am thinking about getting back into comics.
you might be inclined to respond, "sure, why not? comics rule!"
yes, they do rule. but.
did i ever tell you that i, Hyena, have one of the most addictive personalities of anyone i know?
now, i haven't been in a comic book store in three years. there's a very good reason for this. you see, my...
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you might be inclined to respond, "sure, why not? comics rule!"
yes, they do rule. but.
did i ever tell you that i, Hyena, have one of the most addictive personalities of anyone i know?
now, i haven't been in a comic book store in three years. there's a very good reason for this. you see, my...
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VIEW 8 of 8 COMMENTS
tjaden:
one of those things where you can reaffirm your addiction with the simple mantra: "but I'll make money off of these later on... I'll get back what I spent... it's an investment"...
I still have my comics, from back in middle school... packaged away, neatly, awaiting rediscovery during some move twenty years from now... and then I'll go to some futuristic comic shop, and say "Hey, I've got the first appearance of Gambit... also the first appearance of Venom" and the clerk will look at me, befuddled, because he had only dreamed of holding onto the comic that introduced us to Gabit. I will walk out of the store, much richer than when I had walked in... and an obsession long forgotten will have paid off. Or maybe not. Maybe I'll cling to them until the day I die... and then they'll be sold off in an estate sale for 5 cents a piece... which the same futuristic clerk will giddily pay all of a dollar and some change for my entire comic collection...
*ahem*... i think you know where i stand on the matter.
I still have my comics, from back in middle school... packaged away, neatly, awaiting rediscovery during some move twenty years from now... and then I'll go to some futuristic comic shop, and say "Hey, I've got the first appearance of Gambit... also the first appearance of Venom" and the clerk will look at me, befuddled, because he had only dreamed of holding onto the comic that introduced us to Gabit. I will walk out of the store, much richer than when I had walked in... and an obsession long forgotten will have paid off. Or maybe not. Maybe I'll cling to them until the day I die... and then they'll be sold off in an estate sale for 5 cents a piece... which the same futuristic clerk will giddily pay all of a dollar and some change for my entire comic collection...
*ahem*... i think you know where i stand on the matter.
bleh:
be careful , comics are the work of satan and will eat your soul
wow. second day in a row that i'm awake of a morning...
i feel like a should do something productive today. really.
so
maybe.
i feel like a should do something productive today. really.
so
maybe.
tjaden:
heh... could this be the beginning of a habit? though, they say you have to do something for 33 days before it becomes a habit... hmm
uncognitive:
Mornings and productivity are both overrated. Grrr.
i have a favor to ask.
i'm going out to see my best girlfriend in new orleans off. she's going to cyprus for a month to do sculpture. so let's all wish Julie a safe and prosperous trip across the pond, eh?
and one more favor to ask: keep my friend Mel in your thoughts and prayers. let her be safe, healthy and happy as...
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i'm going out to see my best girlfriend in new orleans off. she's going to cyprus for a month to do sculpture. so let's all wish Julie a safe and prosperous trip across the pond, eh?
and one more favor to ask: keep my friend Mel in your thoughts and prayers. let her be safe, healthy and happy as...
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kudra:
I hear you.
uncognitive:
All my best thoughts to Mel. I really hope everything works out for the best.
Good luck to Julie, too.
And hey, some good wishes and happy thoughts for you, too.
Good luck to Julie, too.
And hey, some good wishes and happy thoughts for you, too.
i got some news yesterday. someone i love is in trouble. the details aren't for sharing here, but i should have been on a bus as soon as i heard. i wasn't, and i'm not. i think i would have been too late even if i would have left immediately. it was impractical. i still should have gone. i am kicking myself and worse for...
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VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
uncognitive:
I hope all works out for the absolute best for you and your friend. Be as distracted as you need to be but don't kick yourself for things out of your immediate control. And I'll miss you when you're not around in that virtual internet way. 
ninjagrrl:
Life sounds tough, but I think you can still kick its ass. Have a good evening out and take care.
(^ ^) ng
(^ ^) ng
last night was... intersting. it wasn't really busy, but i made some good money, somehow. the first few hours the owner, (we'll call him Mr. T, for sake of internet anonymity) was in. Mr. T comes in about once or twice a month. he's one of the two owners of the bar i work in, and a bonified asshole. but for some reason unknown to...
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VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
ayin:
Its kind of an anti-climatic end to the day/night...I guess it was probably better that way, though...oh well, sounds a hell of a lot more interesting and story-worthy than my week's been (and believe me, thats a good thing...)
kudra:
Yay. Thank you for writing such a big thing about your best friend. I like hearing about that kind of stuff.
Your work sounds yikes! Glad the Mr. T likes you.
Your work sounds yikes! Glad the Mr. T likes you.
quick quasi-update, then i'm gonna go grab a cappucino and head to work.
more questions, because hey, i thoroughly enjoyed the responses to the last one, and have nothing else to update on. so. take two.
more dumb questions
1. what's your favorite food? are you a vegetarian or vegan?
2. what's your favorite thing (as in inanimate: furniture, art, knick-knack, etc) in your home...
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more questions, because hey, i thoroughly enjoyed the responses to the last one, and have nothing else to update on. so. take two.
more dumb questions
1. what's your favorite food? are you a vegetarian or vegan?
2. what's your favorite thing (as in inanimate: furniture, art, knick-knack, etc) in your home...
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VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
kudra:
1. Saag Alu--I usually don't eat meat, but I've been eating it like MAD lately. Like a mad cow.
2. My favorite thing in my apartment....hmmm. My alter.
3. I am extremely supersticious. Not of the usual stuff, though.
Why will the drunks be tipping you?
2. My favorite thing in my apartment....hmmm. My alter.
3. I am extremely supersticious. Not of the usual stuff, though.
Why will the drunks be tipping you?
b4byl0n:
eheh i love these thingies
1. anything mexican yum yum. imma omnivore -eyes your leg-
2. paper and pen. i write uncontrollably -twitch-
3. supersticious. i think that is instilled in you as a child, specially growin up in louisiana.. heh
you
~x~
1. anything mexican yum yum. imma omnivore -eyes your leg-
2. paper and pen. i write uncontrollably -twitch-
3. supersticious. i think that is instilled in you as a child, specially growin up in louisiana.. heh
you
~x~
Being around my family always winds up bothering me because it makes me feel like I'm still the fucked up person I was in junior high, as opposed to the much differently fucked up person I am now.
It's also weird to be reminded of how much of my personality comes from my parents, as opposed to being actually original. Nothing's better for the ego than the feeling that you're a shitty carbon copy of your parents.
But ride out the pensive and defensive, enjoy the canine company if not the human company, and say hello once you're back in the big easy.
". they're all reminders, almost like tattoos, of events both good and bad. i'd never get rid of them."
YES. I feel the same way. I love scars.
I've heard about that tattooing scarification. I'm just going to finish the one 'real' one I have with a scalpel, then that's it. I dont' really like sitting through cuttings. The one I have (the veve for Santisima Muerte) is extremely important to me, but cutting (unless ritually) just isn't for me.
I'm hoping to turn the Blondie into Joan Jett