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hungery13ear

Member Since 2007

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Monday Mar 23, 2009

Mar 23, 2009
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The all comprehensive review of watchmen without the comprehensiveness!
Straight from the mouth of ME! Wait wait that's not all! An introduction from the GURU HIMSELF!

drum roll....... BILLY NGO!

BANANA HAMMOCK Gets Some New Ideas After Watching Dr. Manhattan in WATCHMEN!
A new reviewer, BANANA HAMMOCK, offers his 2 cents on the WATCHMEN Imax Experience! Go easy on Mr. Hammock, nerds. He hasn't read the comic, thinks the masked heroes have super powers, and might have a weak bladder. I mean, really? Do we really need an intermission on films running 162 minutes long? Really? It's not even three hours.
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After its initial release on March 6th, has the Watchmen steam tank, with all its hype, loss its steam? Perhaps its the new venue (Anaheim GardenWalk) or just the price of the tickets for an IMAX showing ($15), but it seems as if it possibly has. Barely a few stragglers came into the theater as I sat waiting in anticipation for the new movie that a DC comic has put out. But, onto the review!

Opening sequence was great. Some ass kicking here and there. Walls broken. Tables broken. I'm surprised they didnt even show the x-ray of a bone breaking in the sequence! The Comedian, one of the characters I liked in the movie, was getting beat to shit by some nobody and the film never inclined to let the audience know whether or not these killers, assassins, thugs even have any super powers because they ARE fighting FORMER superheroes. They get in, they get out. They perform the nitty gritty and leave.

And whats up with the smiley face logo? Has there been any significance to him? Why place him in the ad spots if you dont provide any background story to it? Many characters were left without a clue as to what was going on, leaving me with a WTF? I guess there is a more in-depth story behind this 2 hour and something movie (there was no intermission!).

Being that I had NO previous background in this series, the movie was good, I suppose. A coherent and easily followed overall story was portrayed onto the screen. At least I wasnt disappointed.

And oh, there was blood, violence, weapons, and all that high caliber stuff every movie should have. BUT there was also NUDITY! What movie would be complete WITHOUT some form of nudity right? No, Im not talking about the nudity at which MOST people enjoy. Im talking about the *gasp* MALE GENETILIA! There you go folks. If you want some un wanton, the all powerful beings Thing in front of your face, go see Watchmen. He has so much will power that it doesnt even move! See how strong this guy is? Tell me, who has encountered a guy who can make his...johnsonobey at will? By the way, there was also some female nudity, but that doesnt really compare to an all powerful scientist whos obtained some form of god like powers and walks around like everythings normal.

Archimedes' flamethrower spurt was also VERY VERY FUNNY! I lold.

Grade: B

- Banana Hammock
littlebaby:
I gave it a B too, but for different reasons.

ps. did you ever figure out who that girl in your class was from SG chat?
Mar 23, 2009

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