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howlinthurston

Member Since 2005

Followers 30 Following 61

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Wednesday May 10, 2006

May 10, 2006
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I had a good secret agent party on saturday. I picked up a black tux jacket for the occasion. All I had was a blue velvet jacket. It's not that the blue jacket isn't fabulous, it's just more Austin Powers than Micheal Cane. Since I don't have the matching blue velvet trousers, I went for the black jacket to match my black pants. The "new" jacket id black wool, wool lapels with a satin band. The guy at the vintage store said it was from '58, so I was happy. I'll get pictures when I bother to mess with my camera.

It took me a day of processing to melt down.

The occasion of the party was it was the host's birthday. The Host and my girlfriend are attracted to each other but he has a wife and a sanctioned girlfriend. so the chances of them hooking up is unlikely, however...
So having grown up with non-violent alcoholics as parents, This is the first time I am not disassociating from my emotions (yes, at fucking 40). I wrote a note to my GF telling her what I was thinking and feeling. She was concerned at how angry and unfair the note was, but that was tame compared to the vitriol that was running through my head.
When does this get easier?
when do i get fixed?

geckogirl:
oh i know i wont come close. i just want something better than the closet kitchen i have now (my admittedly large closet and kitchen are the same size)

just because the people around us aren't ready or welcoming our change, doesnt mean that its not still the right thing to do. keep it up!
kiss
May 10, 2006
texax7:
When does it get fixed, I think when we decide to. It never gets easier though
May 13, 2006

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