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horus73

Coralville,Iowa City,Rio Rancho, Albuquerque, Los Angeles,Kirkwood,Afton,St.Louis, Madison,Sun Prair

Member Since 2003

Followers 78 Following 67

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Tuesday Aug 31, 2004

Aug 31, 2004
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Yeah,

My last journal entry sucked, and it was vague, and I do apologize.

The only reason I didn't get into what was really going on, is because it involved someone else on this site. And though, it wasn't a huge deal(or so I thought), I kind of drifted away from talking about it in the open.

Well, I see that person is off my friends list now-and really, I can't blame her.

I met this other member, at an SG party here in town a little over a month ago. And, well, I seemed to get along with her quite well. So we hung out a few times after.

No biggie, right? Yeah, I thought so, though my feelings were growing more toward "I really like you", and such-kind of junior highish granted. BUt as to where that was going, I don't know-nor will I ever know now. And who do I have to blame for that, me of course.

It's not often that people enjoy my company at all. I'm not used to it-though I have a network of close knit friends, I really feel I generally have a 'boring' presence-so when someone seems to enjoy my company- I enjoy them all the more. And I like this girl, I really do.

Well, one of my friends(though I'm not sure why he chose the timing he did) decided, despite the fact that I started hanging around this girl, to tell a girl from my work, that she should ask me out.

I guess this girl has liked me for some time, and I never knew it. So he pushed her into my life, and not expecting it-I starting liking her as well. It's rare that something like this should happen to me period. Two girls that seem to like me and enjoy my company? I thought it odd, and felt a bit uncomfortable with it all.

Though I do find comfort, in knowing that I was completely, and 100% honest with both of them. And they both still didn't seem to mind, or so I thought.

Well, I managed to c0mpletely piss off one girl, and the other girl just seems to be that much closer now. And it feels as though, I'm to blame for all of it.

I feel REAl bad, and I think I do deserve that. But, I was honest-to the best of my ability-and I do find comfort in that.

No, I still feel like shit-for hurting or feeling as though I deceived someone, even though I haven't. Basically, I feel like an asshole...

But life goes on I guess-and I'll just go on day by day and see how things go.

Yeah, a nother whiny sappy journal entry-but I had to vent a bit...

I'm outtie...
VIEW 8 of 8 COMMENTS
minsc_and_boo:
thanks for the well wishes
Sep 4, 2004
synnove:
my journal has been updated with my ear story. blackeyed
Sep 4, 2004

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