hope_114

I'm afraid to update you guys on my life... I'm afraid to tell anyone... Everyone is mad at me... but I'm doing what I know I need/want to do... I'm all alone in all this now... I don't care either...



:EDIT:

After 7 weeks away from Tim I realized how much I missed him... So I went to pick up my friend that does both of our hair and she said he was coming up to get his hair cut, I had her msg him and tell him I was going to be up there and see if that was ok, he said yeah. So I sat away from him and didn't say anything but my heart was in my stomach seeing him again. He went to leave and said that I had mail at his house and I could come get it.. He left, and called and said he would ride back up there and bring it to me.. When he got back up to the salon we sat and talked for a little bit and he was shaking cause he was so nervous and I was sooo nervous too. Well I asked him if he still missed me and he said he wasn't going to tell me cause it hurts too bad.. then he asked me why I asked and I told him "maybe I miss you"... so yeah. we talked for like 2 1/2 hours in the heat of the day outside.. he left and went to the race track and I went out with my friends.. He came and picked me up from the bar when I was ready to come home. We had a long talk and he is a very changed man.. We are taking it slow but he is having conversations about babies and houses and marriage where before he wouldn't even talk about it let alone think about doing it... but he says when I left I showed him how much he loved me and how bad he was to me, unintentionally... sooo yeah... all but 3 of my friends are mad... my psuedo mom and dad aren't happy... my boss will be pissed... and I ended up hurting Tad and he's being really mean and spiteful now..

so there...