holierthancow

I guess my constant stressing over Christian's (my son's) autism was not only for him, but after reading up on the subject was for myself. Now I've had a few people tell me already they could tell I was... but damnit nobady ever tells me this shit!!! I mean jesus, I didn't even find out I was lactose intollerant until I was 28 damnit!!! I don't know if it was another thing my parents knew, but never broke it to me. Since they were the type to hide things like that and pretend it was fine to keep from upsetting me as a child. I never got a straight story on anything until I was a fucking adult! Still then it was like pulling teeth... to a degree I was kept out of the loop of reality until it hit me like a brick wall in the face. None the less I wouldn't say it's a bad thing knowing what I know now.... at least I know why I'm the way i am (for once in my life). I've also noticed that kind of like in "Rainman" how he's like the uber-brain at mathamatics.... I've seen that trend in my hobbies/life. I cling on to dear life to my art and music I can tell you almost any fact about anything I'm interested in. I just thought I was uber-geek 5000.... but according to http://www.autism-society.org these are some common common traits.... of course to some people who've known me for a while can pinpoint the traits I have.... I myself can name 12 of these I do on a regular if not daily basis.

*Insistence on sameness; resistance to change
*Difficulty in expressing needs, using gestures or pointing instead of words
*Repeating words or phrases in place of normal, responsive language
*Laughing (and/or crying) for no apparent reason showing distress for reasons not apparent to others
*Preference to being alone; aloof manner
*Tantrums
*Difficulty in mixing with others
*Not wanting to cuddle or be cuddled
*Little or no eye contact
*Unresponsive to normal teaching methods
*Sustained odd play
*Spinning objects
*Obsessive attachment to objects
*Apparent over-sensitivity or under-sensitivity to pain
*No real fears of danger
*Noticeable physical over-activity or extreme under-activity
*Uneven gross/fine motor skills
*Non responsive to verbal cues; acts as if deaf, although hearing tests in normal range.

Alright, enough of my little submergance into self exploration.... back to your regular programming........