So I havent posted a blog in a month.
Why?
Mainly because I've been very depressed.
SPOILERS! (Click to view)
I turn 30 in 16 days and when I look at what I've done with my life and where I am I cant really say any of it matters to me. Which silly because I've overcome a lot. I got diagnosed with mental illness twice in my life, I got diagnosed with depression when I was 5 and Autism at 15. I tried ending my life several times till I was institutionalized at 16 and spent 2 years struggling to prove that I was capable of being part of society again. I attended various universities and got a few pieces of paper ending up with a bachelor of applied chemistry and currently working on more. At the age of 28 I traveled to Ecuador and built toilets for the poor so they could get running water, (insert complicated politics here). I then came home and got a job in a lab but as much as I love to science, what I wanted to do with my life was completely different to what I am doing now.
I am constantly jealous of my siblings, they may not be good people ( some belong in prison), or have successful lives but they all have families of their own and compared to that my achievements seem pretty lame.
In less depressing news my training to run in the Auckland marathon is going well I' now doing a 30 minute 4km run most mornings and hoping to kick it up to 5 in the next few days. Though the way I feel afterwards makes it hard for me to believe I used to run almost 10 km in the same amount of time.
