Everyone has someone tonight. Jaymes and her boyfriend, Adam, are downstairs. My other two housemates, Jason and Seals just went into her room. They dated once before, and last night they decided to have sex because they were both so horny. I'm wondering if this is going to become a nightly thing now. Or if they are going down the road to getting back together.
Which means I am in my room alone, for another night in a row. Why does Joshua have to live so far away? I can barely sleep most nights because I miss his arms holding me as we sleep. I miss him so much. I keep reminding myself that the summer isn't that far off. And we're moving in together somewhere around July/August. But I have to live without him month to month. I get to see him about once a month. Since we got together, I've seen him three times. Once was for the week of spring break. That's the most time we've spent alone together (i love oxymorons). Next Friday I'm going to Vegas to visit him for the weekend. Jaymes is going with me. Then, two Fridays after that I might go again. See, on April 23 the college is holding a spring formal that I had wanted Joshua to come up for. But one of his friends' birthday is that day. So Joshua invited me, instead, to come to Vegas to go to the party. Somehow I think I'd have more fun at a party with him and noone else I know than a party with the people I've been going to school with for three years. I just want to be with him--is that so bad?
For a week near the end of May-beginning of June Joshua is going to come visit so we can go apartment-hunting together. I'm very excited about that, but nothing makes being away from him any easier. Not even hearing his voice several times a day over the phone. I want him to hold me, kiss me, again. And again. And again.
I hate this house. When the four of us are hanging out, it's fun. But when everyone goes their seperate ways and suddenly I'm in my room by myself, while everyone has someone with him, I feel very lonely. I guess that's a reason I joined SG. I wanted to find people to talk to on these nights I feel alone.
I just know that when Joshua finally moves here, I won't have to feel alone anymore. I love him so much, I can't explain it in words. Not even a poem I write can fully explain it.
Which means I am in my room alone, for another night in a row. Why does Joshua have to live so far away? I can barely sleep most nights because I miss his arms holding me as we sleep. I miss him so much. I keep reminding myself that the summer isn't that far off. And we're moving in together somewhere around July/August. But I have to live without him month to month. I get to see him about once a month. Since we got together, I've seen him three times. Once was for the week of spring break. That's the most time we've spent alone together (i love oxymorons). Next Friday I'm going to Vegas to visit him for the weekend. Jaymes is going with me. Then, two Fridays after that I might go again. See, on April 23 the college is holding a spring formal that I had wanted Joshua to come up for. But one of his friends' birthday is that day. So Joshua invited me, instead, to come to Vegas to go to the party. Somehow I think I'd have more fun at a party with him and noone else I know than a party with the people I've been going to school with for three years. I just want to be with him--is that so bad?
For a week near the end of May-beginning of June Joshua is going to come visit so we can go apartment-hunting together. I'm very excited about that, but nothing makes being away from him any easier. Not even hearing his voice several times a day over the phone. I want him to hold me, kiss me, again. And again. And again.
I hate this house. When the four of us are hanging out, it's fun. But when everyone goes their seperate ways and suddenly I'm in my room by myself, while everyone has someone with him, I feel very lonely. I guess that's a reason I joined SG. I wanted to find people to talk to on these nights I feel alone.
I just know that when Joshua finally moves here, I won't have to feel alone anymore. I love him so much, I can't explain it in words. Not even a poem I write can fully explain it.
susannahjoy:
ROXANNE!!! yay!!! hi!!!! ok, i promise i'll read your super long entry later, but i gotta go. *snif snif* so sad. i have class from 9:30-3, then work from 4-11. hour drive home. ick. hope you're enjoying sg!