Hey Comunity! i need some feedback, what do you all think about this idea, i have to rewrite a piece of published writing, and i chose Hansel and Gretel, read my synopsis
For my Narrative Essay, I have several different ideas running around my head. The first idea is Hansel and Gretel, in a sort of hyper urbanized 50's era new york. Like Hansel and Gretel meets Streets Of Fire. I am going to try and imitate the Noir stylings of old pulp magazines, so naturally it is going to be 1st person. A "working" summery would be Hansel and Gretel,(from her on refered to as H+G) are kicked from their home after they cannot afford the rent, their parents dead it is up to H to lead a scared G through the city safely, to their uncles diner, where there is work and board. but when H comes across a beautilful woman who leads them to a percieved safe haven, H+G are ambushed by a wiley old pimp, and G is forced to turn tricks, the pimp threatening to kill a very drugged up H if she does not do what he asks. Its here that the narative switches form H to G, and we learn that they have been there for a few weeks now. The pimp lets G tend to H, after being lulled into a false sense of security, and G stabs him in the eye with the heroin needle ment for her brother. waking up her brother, she grabs what jewls and necklasses she can find, and leaves, using the pimp as a hostage, Written in first person, the purpose of the purpose of the narative will remain the same "don't trust strangers".
I think its pretty awesome, but tell me what you think, and be brutal if you need to, cause this is the internet. but don't just tell me it sucks, i need to know why it sucks.
For my Narrative Essay, I have several different ideas running around my head. The first idea is Hansel and Gretel, in a sort of hyper urbanized 50's era new york. Like Hansel and Gretel meets Streets Of Fire. I am going to try and imitate the Noir stylings of old pulp magazines, so naturally it is going to be 1st person. A "working" summery would be Hansel and Gretel,(from her on refered to as H+G) are kicked from their home after they cannot afford the rent, their parents dead it is up to H to lead a scared G through the city safely, to their uncles diner, where there is work and board. but when H comes across a beautilful woman who leads them to a percieved safe haven, H+G are ambushed by a wiley old pimp, and G is forced to turn tricks, the pimp threatening to kill a very drugged up H if she does not do what he asks. Its here that the narative switches form H to G, and we learn that they have been there for a few weeks now. The pimp lets G tend to H, after being lulled into a false sense of security, and G stabs him in the eye with the heroin needle ment for her brother. waking up her brother, she grabs what jewls and necklasses she can find, and leaves, using the pimp as a hostage, Written in first person, the purpose of the purpose of the narative will remain the same "don't trust strangers".
I think its pretty awesome, but tell me what you think, and be brutal if you need to, cause this is the internet. but don't just tell me it sucks, i need to know why it sucks.