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I feel gross. My head is all cloudy. frown It's because I've fallen off the edge for the moment...

I dont usually like talking about it, because I dont want to come off sounding preachy, and I dont want anyone to be annoyed by a personal decision for myself. Being straight edge (wearing the X) actually means something to me though. As a person, I'm stronger...
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colette79:
I think you can say you're walking the edge whenever it feels right for you. There may be some people who consider themselves the "straight edge police", who will always try to make you feel like you could never be as straight edge as they are, or as vegan as they are, or whatever the chosen ideology in question is. Yes, ultimately it is your choice to say yes or no if someone offers you alcohol or weed or whatever, but the only person you really have to answer to is yourself if you slip up. You don't have to justify your choices to anyone else. So if anyone else calls you a hypocrite, screw them and just be as true as you can to your own ideals.

I used to hang out on a vegan chat board, although I am neither vegan nor vegetarian even, and a common saying around there was "One vegan day at a time". Just because you smoked weed (or had one drink, you get the idea...) one time does not mean that you are no longer straight edge. Just like someone who is vegan may "fall off the wagon" so to speak, and eat one piece of cheese, it doesn't negate everything you've done previously. You just have to try again tomorrow.

Anywho, sorry this is so long, I just hope you don't beat yourself up too much over this. A big poo-poo to all the haters that are trying to make you feel bad. blackeyed

bok oink <---see these guys? They're happy that you're not eating them, which is probably more than we can say about any people who are giving you shit about smoking one single time!



kiss
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Listening to "The Magnetic Fields : Epitaph For My Heart"

There really isn't much for me to talk about these past few days. I think I've been feeling a little depressed and/or lonely, and life seems to continue on at about the same pace as it always does. I paid my bills (except visa), been reading a bit, and doing some cleaning. I'm never thrilled...
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colette79:
I hate my work, it's always such a chore to drag myself there. I'd hang out with you, if I was remotely near your end of the country. We could go dancing and be bad dancers together...

The last good kiss I had was probably yesterday, this morning I was grumpy and so my goodbye kiss left a lot to be desired. But as long as you want to be doing it, then for me, all kisses are good kisses. Except for some of my first ones, so many years ago. They were awkward and sucky.

kiss kiss
malloreigh:
It didn't play -- they didn't have the CD!
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Listening to: "Death From Above 1979" and "The Eagles of Death Metal"

Okay, so my weekends coming to a close. I'm tempted to stay up a lot later, but I want to get up at a decent time tomorrow so that maybe I can go for a run or something exercise-like before work. Knowing me though, it's not going to happen. I'm going to have...
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Listening to: Rilo Kiley!

Work was not a lot of fun last night. The chef of the restaurant is constantly doing little things to make me respect him less and less. I wont go into details about his latest exploit, but hes not gaining any points with me lately. I hold my leaders very accountable: if the chef, for instance, doesnt wear a hat on...
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My biggest hobby is music... but I don't actually play anything. I just have a ridiculously large library of music (18+ days continuous, without repeating), and so I spend a lot of time listening to or acquiring more music.

I don't actually pay for all the music in my library, so a lot of time is wasted on the internet trading albums via torrent networks....
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colette79:
Oops, I tried to put a skull smilie in my last comment and it didn't work.

Wow! You are very busy, when do you find time to go to work? I'd love to go out more, but my lack of funds prohibits me from doing a lot of things. But I do have a standing date to go to Karaoke every single Monday. That's a lot of fun, but I wish I knew more people that liked to go dancing on a regular basis. I'd love to go dancing every week or maybe every two weeks, it's like it melts away tension...

I've got to run to work now, I'll talk to you later. Have a great day!

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I'm so low on energy today. Just want to sleeeeeep. I didn't end up staying up too late last night, but it was probably still later than I should have been up (with work this morning and all).

BUT... I got paid today. Not that I have lots of money now, but I can take care of all the little bills I've been putting off....
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colette79:
I've been very boring lately. I mostly just read magazines and waste time. I started learning how to knit, but it's a hobby that takes money for yarn & such, and I don't really have much extra money, what I do have, I end up spending right away. I haven't done any special projects yet.

I want to knit a cute backpack with a skull on it :skull;

What do you do in your free time for hobbies and the like?
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Listening to: All the old music I haven't touched in awhile (The Faint, Bright Eyes, Flaming Lips, Le Tigre, Fugazi and Final Fantasy (the band, not game related))

I don't think going out was a good idea tonight. I saw Malloreigh (only breifly), met another girl and got to dance quite a bit...

But my head's not into this tonight.

I feel really emotionally drained...
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malloreigh:
I've thought I was in love many more times than I actually have been. I think I've also loved more times than I've been in love. There's no sin in that, I don't think; it took me a few trials before I really discovered what love was. I try not to regret that time, or consider it wasted. It's all experience that's lent itself to who and what I am now, right?

(I'm sorry I didn't hang around last night. A friend of mine needed following home soon after you arrived. To be fair, I also couldn't dance another step... I know that those shoes are not, in fact, my new dancing shoes.)
colette79:
Yay! Two SG friends! Hee hee, we popped your SG friend cherry.

I hope you're feeling better now. Did the staying up late help? I couldn't sleep last night, but it wasn't for lack of trying. I was mostly just seething. Little things piss me off, and then I just lie there stewing over them.

I'll let you know as soon as I post a photo of my new hair. I ended up doing something totally different than planned, but I feel like it's more me than the previous colour was.
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I'm tired. Work today was uninteresting, and this whole issue with not being promoted has left me a little less than happy with the job environment.

I want out, but I'm not sure how to do it. I'm not going to quit until I've found something else of course. Finding another job scares me more than wasting time away in this one, because I'm either...
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Urg... I'm upset right now.

With the addition of our new leader in the kitchen, several new positions have opened up. I have made it very clear for some time now that my biggest problem with work was having to work split shifts or evening shifts. Then, recently a position was opened for the day team, and once again, I put my name in the...
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colette79:
That situation at your work really stinks. I also work in a place where they don't seem to appreciate the work we do, even though they expect a lot, especially for a retail position. But then you got screwed over, too. frown

I like your new profile picture! Hilarious! biggrin

Also, your kitty is very cute, but why does he have a little red moustache?
malloreigh:
I was wondering how long it was going to take you to comment on my journal. I told you to do that -weeks- ago! (Nice profile picture, by the way, but I knew before I saw it -- just so you're aware.)