himadhaman

ahh the weekend. My weekends start thursday night. not because i have no work tomorrow. oh i do. early. but because for some reason my roommate always has her boyfriend over on the weekends, and she has apparently wrapped thursday into the bargain since she doesn't work fridays.

why is this worth noting? why does this merit a post all, apparently, of its own?

no reason worth the words it would take to explain. and thats why i'm unhappy.

i'm so tired of being second best. it makes me less of the man i used to be and more of the man i am, by my own choice and despite my best efforts, becoming. it makes me cold. it makes me uncaring.

living up to my name today. the name i gave a life to. the name i took to take that life. the life that has no joy and no rest. this is the life i've taken for my own.

i just want to go to bed and wake up and not care. thats the problem. i've given up on hoping, and thats a problem.