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hettie

Edinburgh

Member Since 2005

Followers 186 Following 139

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How has it been over 4 months?

Mar 2, 2014
1
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I'm not sure where the last few months have gone. I've been busier than I've ever been work wise but it's mostly just me filling my time as I'm also the loneliest I've ever been.

It's been so hard since I stopped working in a sociable office full of girls and went onto a college course where I've not really made any friends. Sure I talk to people in class but outside that there isn't anyone I have anything in common with. I'm not going on nights out as much as I used to and making myself more lonely by working so much. My best friend moving to Barcelona has been so hard and another close friend of mine doesn't ever reply to my messages to meet up any more. I've not felt this alone since I was at school getting bullied. I've hardly touched a drop of alcohol since my friend moved away.

On the plus side I'm not the lightest I've been in a long time weight wise. I've lost 16 pounds since Nov 2012. I've been filling loads of my time up in the gym, the staff there are friendly and chatty and I never feel on my own.

I've been ill a lot too with colds and flus which isn't helping my mood much either. I've just got over a 2 and a half week sinus infection. Getting back to the gym after that has been HARD.

I'm still on and off dating sites but it's really not doing anything positive for my life so I've stopped contacting people. I know when the time is right the right person will come along. Saying that, I've been texting this guy I met on POF for about 3 and a half months. He plays sport professionally and studies physio at the same time. From when we started texting I wasn't really thinking it would go anywhere. I've ended it twice, he's ended it twice yet he still keeps contacting me. Whenever I dismiss it and think it's over it still keeps on going. I do really like him but I feel that he doesn't really have time in his life for me but does like me. It took us 2 and a bit months to have a first date and we've seen each other twice since then. I'm so confused. I just keep thinking over thinking it and at the moment my general state of upset isn't helping matters. If I was still meeting and going on dates with other people I would be a lot more chilled about the whole thing. We shall see what happens.

I promise I will not leave it another 4 months before I'm back!

x

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