hermes

Pop quiz hotshots. You are a teenage girl in a live-college in rural England somewhere.

1) You find a an old blue vase which is apparently linked to voodoo, murder, ghostly apparitions and demonic entities. Do you:

a) put it on the mantlepiece
b) donate it to the local charity shop
c) leave it the f*** alone

2) Your best friend is murdered under mysterious circumstances. Do you:

a) carry on at college as if nothing has happened
b) become obsessed with revenge
c) freak the f*** out

3) This same friend starts appearing to you as a ghostly apparition that no-one else can see. Do you:

a) carry on with meaningless chitchat as if nothing has happened
b) design a ghostbuster battery for her to live in
c) freak the f*** out

4) You are being stalked by a demon with unfathomable powers that hints at his unsavoury intentions for you. Do you:

a) shrug it off as unimportant
b) invite him out to dinner
c) tell him to stay the f*** away from you

5) This same demon invades your bedroom and you find him watching you when you wake up. Do you:

a) scowl at him and otherwise not worry about it
b) ask him to join you
c) freak the f*** out

If you answered mostly a)s then you are obviously Cassie from Hex, a fictional character written by someone with no f***ing clue whatsoever who should really f*** off and give someone with talent a chance to break prime time satellite TV. If you answered mostly b)s then you are entirely mad and should seek professional help. If you answered mostly c)s then perhaps you're ok...