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hemaniscool

Bristol UK

Member Since 2009

Followers 152 Following 185

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Sunday Feb 28, 2010

Feb 28, 2010
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So, how was your weekend?

Mine was pretty good. Went to a friend's wedding on Saturday. Was a really nice day. I must admit I'm a sucker when it comes to weddings. I can get a little emotional. I am a bit of an old romantic. Was really cool hanging out with old friends I haven't seen in a while. Also, weird though cos most of em are very much moving on with their lives. Everyone there was coupled up. Some married, some engaged. There was a new baby there too. I'm still very much lagging behind. I could of got kinda down about that but I didn't. I just love seeing people happy an' shit so it was nice.

Got chatting to a fellow 80's child. She asked what my first dance song would be if i got married. I couldn't think of anything. Then she mentioned this song:

I would totally have this as a first dance! It would be amazing! Yeah, I know I'm a dick but fuck it. It would be hilairious. Don't judge me!! biggrin

I did have to step out before the speeches cos I was getting pretty anxious. I didn't wanna sit there having a panic attack so I just went and sat in my car for half an hour. I don't think anybody really noticed or if they did I don't think they really worried too much. In the old days I would of say there and sweated it out but now I just go take a time out. It's much easier that way.

Today I've felt pretty anxious though. I think with the stress of yesterday I still had a bit of adrenaline pumping through my blood. I went for a run which helped a bit. Gym sesh tomorrow should sort me out.

So, I've decided to get some help in regards to my depression/anxiety. It's hard for me not to feel frustrated cos I now it's my own fault. I should of seen it coming and done something about it. I've had medication and therapy before and it worked. Having to admit I need help again is difficult. I just wanna be like everyone else and that's frustrating. But then what is normal hey? It's worked before so I'm sure it'll get me back on track again and I know I'm always improving.

So, yeah wish me luck. And thanks to those that have put up with me recently. I don't really have any good reason to feel blue. But y'know sometimes it's just how you are.

xx
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
sailorcandy:
thanks, i wish! i just had a week off sick and i feel worse. and i have no holiday left. rubbish il figure something out..
sorry to hear your not too good either! maybe its something in the water down here! x
Mar 1, 2010
wizzle:
Thanks buddy, and best of luck to you. Hope you're good.
Mar 9, 2010

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