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hellzaphat

hyrule

Member Since 2002

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Wednesday Sep 10, 2003

Sep 10, 2003
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Getting into the United States was easier that getting into a bar. From all the horror stories I'd been told, I'd definately expected the worst.
"Identification please"
"I'll I've got is this chewed up driver's license", I said, handing him a very damaged DL with a picture of me when I was sixteen on it, which doesn't even allow me to buy alcohol sometimes.
He replied, in a very friendly tone, "That's okay, did you buy anything in Canada?"
"Just this chips and hummus", I said, pointing at the floorboard where they lay, "Is that okay?"
"Looks delicious" he said, handing me back my DL and waving me by.
It was much more difficult getting into Canada, and they only gave me a week to stay until they would put a warrant out for my arrest if I hadn't proven that I'd left. I never felt very welcome in Canada this time around.

I am now at the Skagit Valley College in Mt. Vernon. Your guess is as good as mine what's next for me. I have as little drive as I have direction. I'm considering driving straight back down to Santa Cruz, and settling there for a coupla months to flex my creative muscle. There are some loose ends I should tie up before I head east and quite possibly overseas.

I should take that trip out to the desert with my dad that we've been meaning to take for a long time. That would certainly be a sure regret should it never happen.

I've always denied peoples' chich observations that I'm looking for myself, mostly because I've always felt like I've known myself pretty well. But I find now that there may be some truth in there. I do desire a deeper understanding of what I am and of my seeming incompatibility with people. I want to better define my personal philosophies and my relationship to the human race. Perhaps, I should sit in a library and do some reading and research, as well as convert/arrange some of my ideas into words, pictures, and sounds.

Before I left, I was stationary. I've lifted myself up and my legs have started swinging. Now, I'm dangling and spinning around. What's gonna happen when/if I touch down?

current mood: inconclusive
current music: Weezer - Undone (The Sweater Song)

Until',
Hellzaphat surreal
jordyn:
Canada never was a big fan of americans, i go up there all the time to see my family and i always get the third degree, but i also have had trouble trying to leave, they thought i was trying to smuggle weed, (I wasn't)

Some people are great at pulling up their roots and travelling with out knowing what the next step will be, I am utterly terrified of not knowing where i'll be. I think i might have wandered to much when i was young I like my stability now, I love to excape but i need to know what will be waiting for me when i come back.

As for dicovering yourself that you may not be doing but exploring your boundries needs wants desires maybe.

have fun-
Sep 15, 2003

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