Thought of the day,
To quote one of my all time, top five, favorite movies: "Only people of a certain disposition are frightened of being left alone for the rest of their lives at twenty six, and we were of that disposition."
It's funny but when the movie came out, these words didn't carry any weight with them.
but now I wonder...
Don't get me wrong , I don't want a relationship right now. Hell No. And even if I did, I'm far too damaged emotionally to get involed with someone right now.
But things are changing , the way things always change. My close knit circle of friends gets smaller and smaller all the time, people move away, get married, have kids. I know this is normal life shit but, I don't think its meant for me.
And I don't want to make new friends, my old friends are loyal, and I totally trust them. I honestly think I'm too old to feign interest in strangers lives or to allow them into my circle.
Yesterday I was at a family bbq and one of my cousins asked me how old I was, I answered "26"
And he mentioned to me that it's all downhill from here, I will start losing my friends until they're all gone.
maybe he's right...that's a fucked up thought though because I like my friends more that I like most of my family.
So I sit here at dusk, in my dark room wondering, where my life is going...
With all the shit I've put up with in my life (especially the last couple of years) I'm beginning to think that my life was not meant to take a conventional path.
So I shudder as I ask "what path lay before me?"
To quote one of my all time, top five, favorite movies: "Only people of a certain disposition are frightened of being left alone for the rest of their lives at twenty six, and we were of that disposition."
It's funny but when the movie came out, these words didn't carry any weight with them.
but now I wonder...
Don't get me wrong , I don't want a relationship right now. Hell No. And even if I did, I'm far too damaged emotionally to get involed with someone right now.
But things are changing , the way things always change. My close knit circle of friends gets smaller and smaller all the time, people move away, get married, have kids. I know this is normal life shit but, I don't think its meant for me.
And I don't want to make new friends, my old friends are loyal, and I totally trust them. I honestly think I'm too old to feign interest in strangers lives or to allow them into my circle.
Yesterday I was at a family bbq and one of my cousins asked me how old I was, I answered "26"
And he mentioned to me that it's all downhill from here, I will start losing my friends until they're all gone.
maybe he's right...that's a fucked up thought though because I like my friends more that I like most of my family.
So I sit here at dusk, in my dark room wondering, where my life is going...
With all the shit I've put up with in my life (especially the last couple of years) I'm beginning to think that my life was not meant to take a conventional path.
So I shudder as I ask "what path lay before me?"