hellcatjustine

non comment leaving motherfuckers.


you know who you are.


so, I think I changed my mind and I am gonna stick out the new job for a bit. Maybe I'll be good at it. cause I'm good at everything else.

yeah, bet you can even hear me laughing on that one.


I wanna go dancing. I miss dancing. I guess my dance partner isn't talking...
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la de fucking da.


I think I hate my new job. I think most of my coworkers are a bunch of cokeheads. Fuck all that.

I think I lost two pounds.

I am going to be a surprise tonight. I cannot wait.

I want it all. Every single bit of it.

But the question is, can I have it?

I grok that maybe I can....
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a long day. real long.


the new job is crazy. I'm still not sure about it yet.


everything else, is what keeps me together. even though sometimes I'm not.


being needy and insecure has it's drawbacks.

but being loved...can make up for that?

you do what you can, what you have to.



In the words of the great Webb Wilder:
Put love above everything else,...
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just can't get it right.


so, I did prepare an update, and the site was down last night for updating.


so, here it is, getting ready for my first day of the new job.

I spent most of yesterday, and all of last night being ignored. and unappreciated.

I wish I could get more than two consecutive hours of sleep.

I wish other things as...
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lend me your ears...and I'll tell you about the things I fear...


what a day. I went all over creation and back today. lots of crisis dealings today.

my gramma took me shopping, I got some rad new clothes for the new job. and another set of tweezers.

it's hair color time this weekend. my roots are hideous.

saw the punisher flick tonight. it was...
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could I be any dumber if I tried?

I can't find my tweezers, and I tried to touch up my eyebrows with a razor. BAD IDEA. I might not leave the house for awhile. oh, the horror.


I'm quitting the pizzawhore job tomorrow. my car can't take the beating.

I went to a coffeeshop and half listened to boys talk geek, and checked out the...
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walked a mile and a half with the dog, car wouldn't start, dentist, novacaine, come home, boyfriend fixes car, taking it to shop tomorrow.

low carb dinner, low carb dessert, world class fucking.


throw a nap or two in there too. ozzy on leno. i hate leno, but love ozzy.

sacred heart of jesus candle, cigarette smoke, webb playing in the background.

half a valium,...
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talk about luck...


Now I have a raging UTI. fucking ugh.

doctor today, peed in a cup. this is pretty humbling, if you are a girl. The nurse was surprised at how much weight I have gained since Feb. Yeah, I know, I'm getting to be a real porker...

I get to eat yogurt for a few days. woohoo.

tonight I'll be making scrambled eggs...
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and so it begins again.

I thought I had to work tonight, but apparently I don't. well. alrighty then.

Mom is going to help some.

I wish I didn't need help. I wish I could just handle my shit on my own. fuck.

so, I guess my afternoon just got freed up.

making a quiche tonight. a crustless one. low carb heaven. yeah, I am...
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You wanna lift me up but
you don't know and you don't see
I'm stuck in my ways




getting a hair cut today. just a trim, I need it.

having an off day, I am. Some days are better than others.

Just worrying about things, too much, I suppose.

I wish I could be better at all the things I lack.

When does it get...
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