While driving home from shopping just us two I figured it was a good time to tell her and explain everything to her. Boy was I nervous, my mom is a little much at times so I wasn’t exactly sure how she would react.
For a while I’ve been trying to figure out a good time to tell her that this is what I do for fun and why it means so much to me. I guess there’s not really any easy or good time to tell you mom your naked on the internet, well in my case anyways. Growing up in a small country town most people just wouldn’t understand it, including my mom.
I explained exactly what suicide girls and what it means to me and why I do it. I’ve told her how long I’ve done it and she was upset. She was more upset with the fact that its taken me so long to tell her. She supports me 100% in what I do and she said she would support me in this too, it was a huge weight lifted off my shoulders and the whole time I was explaining everything to her I was shaking, my voice was shaking. Geez it was scary.
She’s happy for me that I can inspire people with similar body times and that I’m so comfortable in my own skin that I am able to experience something like this. I also explained to her about the community on here and how everyone is so amazing. I talked to her about all the friends I’ve made and how we send each other letters and mail if we are too far to hang.
The only thing she said after I explained everything to her was that she wanted to see pictures, so I showed her my one of my sets and she didn’t really say anything. She was a little surprised by how naked I was I think. Even though I explained it to her but to see it I guess is a different story. She also asked to see the girls I know, and she was like why aren’t they naked ( I was like 5 photos into the set), so I was like just wait they will be.
Overall it went better than I expected and she wasn’t as mad as I thought. She was really worried about people I know finding out. If you’ve ever lived in a small town you know word travels fast! I know it may seem a little ( A LOT) much but I literally have gone and blocked everyone I know (unless I’ve told them about SG) and their friends and family on Instagram and the fact that It’s not my real name I feel like there’s way less of a chance finding out now and If they do I really don’t care. I know people look at me different already, with my coloured hair and full of tattoos but in the end I love being me and I love being able to do what I love and all the great people I’ve met online. Also the fact that being a bigger girl I can inspire people to love themselves really touches my heart.
I love my SG family and I’m happy that my mom knows, I even invited her to the black heart burlesque show!
Anyways I’m just rambling and should probably actually do some work now, but I wanted to write about this big thing that has happened.
Have any of you ladies told you parents?
Xoxo
Heidi Mae
