heckler

I must be getting old

the new batch of students has moved to town & I find myself looking at all the girls thinking " They're cute, but too young for me"

Hold me, I'm scared

Rough day today
Asthma attack on the way to work
Puncture
On my own for 7 hours
Ridiculously busy all day (60 customers an hour busy )
Low blood sugar levels
Dehydrated
Stressed
2 annoying reps
Maintenance on the store alarm system meaning it kept being set off
I just about avoided a panic attack in work
Fixed the puncture & cycled home (into a...
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I like flirting.

I flirt with pretty much everyone.
Except if I'm actually interested them. Then I become a nervous wreck incapable of speech let alone anything else

Earlier today my most stunningly attractive customer (if I were to try & describe "my type" the simplest way would be to show a photo of her ) came into the shop & preceded to go through...
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Its been a busy weekend & I'm in a very introverted & uncommunicative state of mind at the moment (not in a bad way its just how I get some times ) but I'm finally get around to updating.

I had the most chilled & relaxing week in a long time last week
Despite my own fears & my sisters warnings that a week on...
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Well I'm off for the week

The camping gear is packed & ready to go.
The car is fueled up

I'll be gone 1st thing in the morning

See you all next weekend

I'll miss you all




(if someone would kindly leave regular, concise, news on all the silliness happenings I'd appreciate it )

Despite appearances I wasn't actually in a bad mood when I wrote my last blog.
I was just annoyed with Kate & even that only lasted a few hours.
I don't like judging her to harshly as I know shes had some issues she needs to sort out & because I see so much of my own past behavior in the way she acted.

Anyway...
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Bloody Women!!!!!!!!!

Why the hell can't they just give a straight answer.

As you may be able to tell this evening was not exactly a great success.
I went to Kate's gig only to have her pretty much ignore me all night

At least the night wasn't a complete waste.
I can say with some certainty that we won't be getting back together ( &...
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I'm confused (nothing unusual there I know )

Kate asked me to come along to a gig she's playing on sunday .

The question is why?

Did she ask as a friends or something more?

I suppose there's only 2 ways to find out. Go along or just come staright out & ask her.
I'm way to much of a coward for option 2 so...
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I realise pretty much all my posts on here are me being miserable

I'm usually a very happy person


Honest


I tend to use this when i need to rant or feel sorry for myself


I'll try to write more happy blogs in the future


No guarantees though

I used to suffer with a recurring, terrifying & vivid dream.

In my dream I would wake up & be completely paralysed.
I'd struggle & fight to move or even twitch.
The panic would quickly increase until it was unbearable.
Then I would wake for real.
Usually dripping with sweat & being close to hyperventilating.
My whole body completely tense & with a feeling of...
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