man, i am so sick of this shit.
i am sick of the cynics and the critics and all the people blind to beauty: there are too many. i'm sick of the bastards and the bitter and the jaded and the beaten. i am sick of defeat. resignation. complacence/
deprecation and self-deprecation and self-righteousness and self-serving selfish selfless bastards. women seeped with sorrow and no will to get out. people who believe they were born with only one leg.
weakness. fear. hatred. laziness. FUCK YOU. and judgement, especially... i hate judgemental people. you know. judge judgement. prejudiced against prejudice. intolerant of intolerance. hate hatred. it's all bullshit. hamurabi or who the fuck ever and his code. "an eye for an eye" he says. "and the whole world's blind" says someone else. "what's so bad about blindness, anyways?" asks me.
funny because i was just trashing the people blind to beauty. so bloody contradictory... if i'm going to try to be HONEST i might as well be consistent. but i'm not sure that consistancy is truth either. life is too blurry for that. but i am honest, in the sense that i believe everything i say. even when one thought clashes with the next. no wonder i'm in so much turmoil! truly believing that the world is black and white. truly believing in the beauty of the shades of grey. truly believing in colour!
it isn't beauty and ugliness that i'm fighting against. not that i'm fighting. yay rah taoism. but... it isn't beauty and ugliness themselves. it was when someone said, "beauty is good. ugliness is bad." it was when someone said, "beauty and ugliness cannot be one and the same." that was when i stopped believing in things. and that was very early on.
man.... passion. that's everyone's favourite baby, yeah? mine too. passion is great. i've never had passionfruit but i'm sure it's good too. but the reason passion is so powerful, so attractive, is that it is honest. it may not always be true but it is honest. it is raw and it is strong and it is real. i guess that's what we're looking for. within ourselves, within others, within life. "we" being me.
i am sick of the cynics and the critics and all the people blind to beauty: there are too many. i'm sick of the bastards and the bitter and the jaded and the beaten. i am sick of defeat. resignation. complacence/
deprecation and self-deprecation and self-righteousness and self-serving selfish selfless bastards. women seeped with sorrow and no will to get out. people who believe they were born with only one leg.
weakness. fear. hatred. laziness. FUCK YOU. and judgement, especially... i hate judgemental people. you know. judge judgement. prejudiced against prejudice. intolerant of intolerance. hate hatred. it's all bullshit. hamurabi or who the fuck ever and his code. "an eye for an eye" he says. "and the whole world's blind" says someone else. "what's so bad about blindness, anyways?" asks me.
funny because i was just trashing the people blind to beauty. so bloody contradictory... if i'm going to try to be HONEST i might as well be consistent. but i'm not sure that consistancy is truth either. life is too blurry for that. but i am honest, in the sense that i believe everything i say. even when one thought clashes with the next. no wonder i'm in so much turmoil! truly believing that the world is black and white. truly believing in the beauty of the shades of grey. truly believing in colour!
it isn't beauty and ugliness that i'm fighting against. not that i'm fighting. yay rah taoism. but... it isn't beauty and ugliness themselves. it was when someone said, "beauty is good. ugliness is bad." it was when someone said, "beauty and ugliness cannot be one and the same." that was when i stopped believing in things. and that was very early on.
man.... passion. that's everyone's favourite baby, yeah? mine too. passion is great. i've never had passionfruit but i'm sure it's good too. but the reason passion is so powerful, so attractive, is that it is honest. it may not always be true but it is honest. it is raw and it is strong and it is real. i guess that's what we're looking for. within ourselves, within others, within life. "we" being me.