heatherann

So, Phoenix was lame. As it always is. I always get there, and as soon as I'm on the ASU campus, I bloat. It's like my body knows that it needs to provide an actual physical manifestation to prove that all of my negative self-talk is true. "See? You look five months pregnant. You really are letting yourself go."

Once I get over the envy of the super toned, super blonde large-breasted tanness of it all, the place really starts to just depress me. It's incredibly generic and homogenized there, everyone looks like a carbon copy of everyone else. No one is different. And I get it. I get that it's college, and I get that fitting in is still super important. But it's so sad to see so many people who think they have to subscribe to just one extremely narrow standard of beauty.

And some stupid shit happened while I was away. However, the timing couldn't have been more perfect since I was too busy to overthink it and let it really get to me. Thank you, Melissa. It's the one cool thing you've done since I've known you. Only now that I'm back, it's all kind of descending on me, and it's feeling overwhelming.

So, while I'm relieved to be home, sleeping in my own bed in a place where you're expected to be pale in February, I'm feeling like I can't deal with life.

So that's that.

I'm still trying to catch up. And failing miserably.