havokinblack

so today was a bad day. i went to work was flying good and all then at 11ish Jamie walked past and i sank so low i felt like an ant. i miss her so fucking bad. i just started shaking so bad i couldn't hold a knife i'm still feeling shit so i pinned myself somemore. and i've smoked a whole pack of ciggies and been trying to write songs to let her know what she means to me. been listening to Miley Cyris:7 things, the Veronicas:This love, Soko:i'll kill her, Atreyu:Lip Gloss And Black AFI:Morningstar anywhos i'm sick of this i just wanna get her back and live forever with her cause i know deep inside she must be the one you dont go this fucking crazy if its not right. i've pierced my ears more and my chest and now my arm. i'm loving the rush of the pain it's helping. I'm sure it wont get worse than this. but who knows i feel empty usless and morbid...

I feel the blackend heart has returned and it will stay forever more i need my lenore