hastwothumbs

"Strange and Crappy Short Story Bonanza" entry number fourteen, which makes a full two weeks of stories.

Congratulations on solving the curse of the submarines revenge, old boy, jollied Constable Postmaster.

Thanks, was all Detective Rick Guttle responded with. He then realized the gathered crowd wanted him to speak further, so he said, I couldnt have cracked this case without the help of my trusty brain. The crowd applauded this. Brains had recently become quite fashionable in northern Europe, much in part to Guttles current lecture tour on the brains role in filling the void where our souls should be. Now if youll excuse me gentlemen and ladies, I must depart to the States. Those Indian chaps arent going to last the winter and I must take a chieftains daughter as my bride.

But, why? Asked Constable Postmaster. Why travel the oceans when all of England offers her daughters to you?

Because an old man said it was my destiny, Guttle explained. And I never ignore anything old or destined.

The crowd applauded him as he ascended the steam vessels gangplank. However, they couldnt help but be disappointed at the distinct lack of marauder attack. Normally, Detective Guttle was a veritable magnet for raiders. It seemed there was a time when he couldnt set foot aboard a sailing ship without it being overrun by pirates or sea meanies.

Some of the less respectable gentlemen began saying that Guttle had lost his touch, that Guttle was no longer a death-defying detective of danger he was now just an overrated file clerk. Such talk had plagued him since childhood. The seasoned Guttle easily ignored the few jibbers and jabbers, writing them off as simple investiphobes.

Deep down, however, his inner child was crying.