More goth club goodness last night.
Wait a second! I've left the house twice in one week?
There's gotta be something screwy going on. Maybe someone drugged the water.
Anyway, I didn't do the twist this time. I just kind of sat around and stared at girls.
But don't worry, I still managed to live up to my expected state of stupid. This time I LITERALLY looked stupid. Not only did I wear a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles t-shirt that had all the Turtles smiling and yelling "Turtle Power!", but I also put a temporary tattoo of Spider-Man's spider logo on my forearm.
The guy I went with made it pretty clear that he was embarrassed to be seen with me, even though he was dressed like something out of an Old Navy ad.
Hey! If he's an Old Navy ad, then I'm the centerfold for Dorks, Illustrated. HAHAHAHAH... yeah.
Want to know the best part, though?
I didn't put the temp tattoo on for the sake of the goth club. See, it came this box of Spider-Man fruit snacks and as I was sitting around (long before I even knew I was going to a club) I thought, "Hey, I think I'll put that on because I like Spider-Man." That's what kind of nerd/geek/dork I am.
Does it sound like I'm bragging about this? 'Cause I'm not.
But like I said, lots of sitting was done. My friend went around and talked to a few girls, though. Actually, we spent most of the night not hanging out with each other.
Before we went in, he made me wait outside on a random street corner for the better part of an hour while he went to smoke crack with some homeless guy. THEN he comes back and says, "Hey, man, I just blew all my money. Can you pay for me to get in the club?" Which meant that I could A.) Pay for him, which means spend $30: $10 each to get in, plus $10 for parking or B.) Go home, which means I spent $10 to park four blocks away so I could get cursed at by panhandlers.
Then, when we came out (he wanted to leave early because the crack made him tired; no joke, either), he went back and talked to the homeless guy again. Which meant another twenty minutes of sitting on Hollywood Blvd at 1 in the morning.
The jerk.
I seriously need to find new friends.
Or at least just one new friend.
'Cause once DefunctJunk leaves for college in a few weeks, I'm only going to have one friend to hang out with. And I don't even really like this one friend all that much to begin with.
Wow. That's really despressing.
At least one good thing came out of it all. For whatever reason, I got this episode of Late Night With Conan O'Brian stuck in my head. During an interview, the conversation turns to how David Hasselhoff signs all his autographs. Apparently, he signs them all with "Stay cool."
So this got me thinking. What if "stay cool" is not a friendly compliment, but rather a threatening command? I bet Hasselhoff has kicked many an ass because fans have not, in fact, stayed cool. Imagine: you're watching a rerun of Star Trek and Hasselhoff just magically appears and yells, "Damn it, Trudy! I told you to stay cool! Is this you're idea of staying cool?! The 'Hoff thinks Star Trek is totally not cool. So you have not stayed cool, like I told you to!" And then he nails Trudy with a Stone Cold Stunner.
David Hasselhoff: Brutal dictator of all that is hip?
It might explain why he's so big in Germany...
Okay, so maybe that's not as funny as it was when I was bored, mad, and trying to ignore the homeless guy screaming about how evil white people are.
So there was a pretty hefty load of suck going on last night.
Lucikly, pretty goth girls make it all worthwhile.
...Even if I don't talk to them because I never grew out of the "girls are scary" mentality.
In cooler news: I get to go to a Bob Dylan concert on Sunday. Yay! And I have a ticket to see Radiohead in a few months. So that rocks.
And maybe I'll venture out to Hollywood for a third time in one week to see The Minibosses in concert tomorrow.
Parting comment goes here.
Wait a second! I've left the house twice in one week?
There's gotta be something screwy going on. Maybe someone drugged the water.
Anyway, I didn't do the twist this time. I just kind of sat around and stared at girls.
But don't worry, I still managed to live up to my expected state of stupid. This time I LITERALLY looked stupid. Not only did I wear a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles t-shirt that had all the Turtles smiling and yelling "Turtle Power!", but I also put a temporary tattoo of Spider-Man's spider logo on my forearm.
The guy I went with made it pretty clear that he was embarrassed to be seen with me, even though he was dressed like something out of an Old Navy ad.
Hey! If he's an Old Navy ad, then I'm the centerfold for Dorks, Illustrated. HAHAHAHAH... yeah.
Want to know the best part, though?
I didn't put the temp tattoo on for the sake of the goth club. See, it came this box of Spider-Man fruit snacks and as I was sitting around (long before I even knew I was going to a club) I thought, "Hey, I think I'll put that on because I like Spider-Man." That's what kind of nerd/geek/dork I am.
Does it sound like I'm bragging about this? 'Cause I'm not.
But like I said, lots of sitting was done. My friend went around and talked to a few girls, though. Actually, we spent most of the night not hanging out with each other.
Before we went in, he made me wait outside on a random street corner for the better part of an hour while he went to smoke crack with some homeless guy. THEN he comes back and says, "Hey, man, I just blew all my money. Can you pay for me to get in the club?" Which meant that I could A.) Pay for him, which means spend $30: $10 each to get in, plus $10 for parking or B.) Go home, which means I spent $10 to park four blocks away so I could get cursed at by panhandlers.
Then, when we came out (he wanted to leave early because the crack made him tired; no joke, either), he went back and talked to the homeless guy again. Which meant another twenty minutes of sitting on Hollywood Blvd at 1 in the morning.
The jerk.
I seriously need to find new friends.
Or at least just one new friend.
'Cause once DefunctJunk leaves for college in a few weeks, I'm only going to have one friend to hang out with. And I don't even really like this one friend all that much to begin with.
Wow. That's really despressing.
At least one good thing came out of it all. For whatever reason, I got this episode of Late Night With Conan O'Brian stuck in my head. During an interview, the conversation turns to how David Hasselhoff signs all his autographs. Apparently, he signs them all with "Stay cool."
So this got me thinking. What if "stay cool" is not a friendly compliment, but rather a threatening command? I bet Hasselhoff has kicked many an ass because fans have not, in fact, stayed cool. Imagine: you're watching a rerun of Star Trek and Hasselhoff just magically appears and yells, "Damn it, Trudy! I told you to stay cool! Is this you're idea of staying cool?! The 'Hoff thinks Star Trek is totally not cool. So you have not stayed cool, like I told you to!" And then he nails Trudy with a Stone Cold Stunner.
David Hasselhoff: Brutal dictator of all that is hip?
It might explain why he's so big in Germany...
Okay, so maybe that's not as funny as it was when I was bored, mad, and trying to ignore the homeless guy screaming about how evil white people are.
So there was a pretty hefty load of suck going on last night.
Lucikly, pretty goth girls make it all worthwhile.
...Even if I don't talk to them because I never grew out of the "girls are scary" mentality.
In cooler news: I get to go to a Bob Dylan concert on Sunday. Yay! And I have a ticket to see Radiohead in a few months. So that rocks.
And maybe I'll venture out to Hollywood for a third time in one week to see The Minibosses in concert tomorrow.
Parting comment goes here.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
wow. Leather Man sounds cooler than all of us, plus my ex [the garbage head one] and your crackhead friend combined.
im thinking either "The Irish Pub Fight" or
"The Mead Hall Brawl"
whaddya think?