I am turning 29 this Monday and tonight, since Monday is a work day, I decided to have a small party. For the last couple of weeks, I have been struggling with the idea of even trying something. Too many years no one has shown up, or only one person has shown up on my birthday. Not just any day, MY BIRTHDAY! They always give the same half ass excuses and I was getting really sick of it. I honestly did not want them around on my birthday this year and that also led to me not being sure if I even wanted to try something. I didn't want to be disappointed or left alone again. However, I decided to try it. I decided to invite mostly friends I had met at my recent job, and a few others outside of work. I passed over those who have let me down so many times before.
A good crowd, more than I could have expected showed. We went bowling, after which one had to go home. Still, she came out, gave me time out of her day and genuinely wanted to be there. She didn't blow me off and she had a good reason to have to go home. It wasn't a bunch of bullshit. After that, the others and I went to one bar, but they weren't having karaoke, so we went to another. There, we drank and sang. I sang "Rave On" by Buddy Holly, "Stagger Lee" by Lloyd Price and finally "Blueberry Hill" by Fats Domino. It was so much fun.
I could easily tell everyone wanted to be there and that they were having a genuine good time. It wasn't like they were trying, just for my sake while honestly not having a good time or wanting to be there. They made me feel like I wasn't alone, which I've felt that way for years. They made me feel welcome. I could tell they wanted me to have fun and they actually put effort into it. I'm a good guy, I deserve that. They showed me love and support that I haven't really felt in a long time. It was just a great time. I think I will actually be able to sleep well tonight, as I am going to go to bed in a good mood.
You may think the party seemed small scale, or that it wasn't anything special. Maybe it wasn't a big party. Maybe it wasn't something grand. However, it's the few who honestly care that are worth more than many who really don't. I'm seriously filled with joy right now.
