hallk

my dog is going down hill fast and we don't really know why. HE can't walk and is in a ton of pain and is almost lifeless. i went to see him today. They asked what i wanted to do. i wanted a cancer scan, i couldnt put him to sleep without fully knowing. That came up negative. So we decided and the doc agreed to go two more days in the hospital. Only a small chance he will recover. HE is getting pain meds so he is somewhat comfortable. He just cant walk and his back leg wont hold weight. He said his age could be the reason he cant fight this off. He was lifeless. I hope he makes it through tonight. I'd rather put him to sleep and the last thing he sees and feels is me looking and petting him........

Full on have anxiety attack when i went over to the vet to see my dog and talk about the situation. Took a bunch of nerve pills that i haven't have in like 5 years and passed out. That is normally not me, i'm usually stronger. I"m being such a pussy but Sprocket was pretty much my kid and best friend.


This just proves i'm really going to lose it when my mom goes since she is the only one left


i'm going to get drunk tonight prob and i don't normally drink. Sorry i' m being such a drama queen. i don't handle death well.....

i don't feel like spell checking, please excuse errors. i'm not totally with it right now.