The Lighthouse Cafe, in Defiance Ohio made the best burgers in town, hands down. They also sold wooden lighthouses, bibles and other religious books, and prepared your taxes.
Now I could deal with the lighthouses. Sure, Lighthouse Cafe, sells lighthouses. Not a problem. I could even get behind the book trade. (It gave you something to read while you waited for your steakburger.... mmmmm.... steakburger.) Taxes... well, I didn't get my taxes done there, but I'm sure they would have been hot, fresh, and served with ketchup.
One day, while waiting for a steakburger, I noticed a children's book on one of the shelves. Being a child myself, I picked it up and began to read. Little did I know that the book would haunt me forever.
It was called "Love You Forever".
And it started out just fine. Baby is born, mom cradles the baby and sings "I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, as long as your living, my baby you'll be." Aww. That's sweet.
Baby gets older. Mom waits till the kid is sleeping, then goes in and picks up the sleeping child and sings. Still OK at this point, it's nice when mom rocks you to sleep. Teenage kid shuts mom out of life, as some teenagers do, mom sneaks into his room and picks the child up and sings. OK. When I was a teenager, if my mom came in to my room when I was NOT HOME it was a problem ... coming in and picking me up and singing ... loosen the apron strings, Mom.
Then the child gets married. AND MOM DRIVES ACROSS TOWN WITH A LADDER STRAPPED TO THE ROOF OF HER CAR, CLIMBS IN HIS WINDOW, WEDGES HERSELF BETWEEN HIM AND HIS NEW WIFE, PICKS HIM UP AND SINGS!!!!! Does anyone else see a problem with this??? There's a picture of her driving with the ladder on her car! Mom's gone over to the bad place!
Now I know that the author had the best of intentions with this book, talking about the themes of unconditional love, and the bond between a mother and a child. But YIKES! There is a point where it's no longer love, but borderline stalking!
I was saved by a steakburger that day. I put the book away, and tried not to think of it anymore. But sometimes at night, just before I fall asleep, I hear that song, and it doesn't comfort me. It makes me pee.
Now I could deal with the lighthouses. Sure, Lighthouse Cafe, sells lighthouses. Not a problem. I could even get behind the book trade. (It gave you something to read while you waited for your steakburger.... mmmmm.... steakburger.) Taxes... well, I didn't get my taxes done there, but I'm sure they would have been hot, fresh, and served with ketchup.
One day, while waiting for a steakburger, I noticed a children's book on one of the shelves. Being a child myself, I picked it up and began to read. Little did I know that the book would haunt me forever.
It was called "Love You Forever".
And it started out just fine. Baby is born, mom cradles the baby and sings "I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, as long as your living, my baby you'll be." Aww. That's sweet.
Baby gets older. Mom waits till the kid is sleeping, then goes in and picks up the sleeping child and sings. Still OK at this point, it's nice when mom rocks you to sleep. Teenage kid shuts mom out of life, as some teenagers do, mom sneaks into his room and picks the child up and sings. OK. When I was a teenager, if my mom came in to my room when I was NOT HOME it was a problem ... coming in and picking me up and singing ... loosen the apron strings, Mom.
Then the child gets married. AND MOM DRIVES ACROSS TOWN WITH A LADDER STRAPPED TO THE ROOF OF HER CAR, CLIMBS IN HIS WINDOW, WEDGES HERSELF BETWEEN HIM AND HIS NEW WIFE, PICKS HIM UP AND SINGS!!!!! Does anyone else see a problem with this??? There's a picture of her driving with the ladder on her car! Mom's gone over to the bad place!
Now I know that the author had the best of intentions with this book, talking about the themes of unconditional love, and the bond between a mother and a child. But YIKES! There is a point where it's no longer love, but borderline stalking!
I was saved by a steakburger that day. I put the book away, and tried not to think of it anymore. But sometimes at night, just before I fall asleep, I hear that song, and it doesn't comfort me. It makes me pee.
and why were you in ohio and not visiting me!?