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halfjack

bmore

Member Since 2005

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Monday Nov 21, 2005

Nov 20, 2005
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it's like 7:30. or something. it's early. i had to wake up and get a ride down to work 40 minutes before my shift so i wouldn't get caught in traffic. i probably only got an hour of sleep last night. ok so this ain't that bad. thing is, in that one hour of sleep i had one of the most horrible dreams that i've ever remembered. see nightmares are nothing new for me, at all. but when it's an old recurring nightmare that i usually don't remember, mixed in with some fiction, and the key player in the memory's story switched with say, my lover, it shakes me. i woke up today shaking. i could barely even cry. i lay in bed unable to go back to sleep. i couldn't get some of the images out of my head.i just waited for my roomate to come and rush me. i can't stop shaking. i have to go down soon. i'll work til 6 and hate it and play the helpful barristo and get drunk and go home and not talk to the one person i want to call because we're fighting right now.

i hate it when days start out like this.



thanks for listening to me bitch. i'll be ok. just bored and venting i guess.

also, the answer was "the ghost of corperate future" by regina spektor. it's off of her soviet kirsch album and you should all own it. salud
VIEW 11 of 11 COMMENTS
mercie:
All this mushiness in your journal comments serves to remind me how much I suck. And I don't have horrid nightmares often but when I do, I remember them and those fuckers are vivid. Too bad the nice dreams don't stick around like that.
Nov 22, 2005
mercie:
Well because I don't have anyone to be mushy with me, is how I suck. FUCKING suck, in fact. But, drugs love me, and I love them back... it's almost as fulfilling as a real relationship. Human contact is overrated anyway. way overrated.

I'm rambling now. Thanksgiving is gonna suck. ugh!
Nov 23, 2005

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