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grlgoddess9

Echo Park

Member Since 2005

Followers 25 Following 39

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Thursday Nov 24, 2005

Nov 24, 2005
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wow. i feel somehow inflamed. Not quite on fire but inflamed. My office/studio/infra-structure thing that I've been working on is coming together just as I see it in my mind. iBook, graphic tablet, drawing board, architect stool, task chair, computer cart, printer/scanner/copier, midi usb keyboard. it's all right at the level I'm working from. Exactly where I need it to be. I'm finding my way to what I want to put out; to what I do and it's a high that is quiet and tranquil like free falling in a skydive, or being at the nucleus of the storm.

Seemingly nothing dissuades or impedes me. An excuse pops up as to why I shouldn't do something or why I shouldn't do it right now. Next thing I know I'm doing it anyway. The excuse falls away in the face of accomplishing exactly what it is I've set out to accomplilsh.

I think part of it is that I've wanted what I want right now so long that I cannot help manifesting it. Like creative vsualization. I've seen myself cranking out the pages, the drawings, the audio in daydreams, dreams, and in my minds eye in sort of a meditation.

Then I come on this site and here is Jess and Drake and Noelle completely living their thing.

Jess so knocked me out because she just flat out is doing her thing. Her first set is in her room and what she is wearing is her own outfit. She is real. She is not fantasizing; she is actualized.

Drake is a comic book head in the best sense of the word. I know that ain't all she is but let's just go with this for a minute. She digs Ash Wood. So what does Drake do? She joins dude. She steps it up and totally does Wood off her own tip. She allows the influence and swims in it to a new place. It's impossible not to be inspired by someone who walks out there like that.

Probably to Drake, she is just doing her thing. She's working what she has on hand and what is in her head. It's that taking for granted thing again. It's about having what it takes to do and to exploit whatever it is you have going for you to such a degree that a fineness comes out of it. And that extreme communicates itself to other people. But you were just working. No end result in your mind. Just the work. How far can you take it? Where does it take you?

I have a feeling I may well be saying hugely obvious things here, but hell it's my journal, and I'm keeping track of this beginning for me.

The learning curve of all the euipment I got is intense, and I find myself coming home from work and jumping into it no matter how tired I feel or what kind of day I've had. It mostly feels like it's just part of it--part of my day I mean. And that my day isn't over until I've written some pages or drawn something or figured out somehing in garage band. I even try to take at least one photograph a day to see where it is I am. What do I see every day; what's in my vision?

It changes you. I am more aware of how much I am a part of where I live and what a large expanse is covered in my view of what is my neighborhood. It just might be endemic to my being a Los Angeleno.

I live in Echo Park and my neighborhood is that and Silver Lake and Hollywood and West Hollywood. I travel it every day. And now I see it. I can see my home. And sometimes I see where Raymond Chandler was talking about and it makes me grin.
drake:
Haha, you are too cool. Your comments always make me laugh. I like your fav. sexual position too, but man, that one is hard to get into!
Nov 24, 2005

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