greekdevils

well, a couple nights ago Iet my guard down and said a couple of things to this girl that I probably shoulnd't have...not embarassing things, but just things that were self degrading..I dunno what I said though so maybe I'm overreacting lol today I feel like the only way I'm going to get where I want to is to be patient. I saw her last night and it was all smiles and stuff, so I'm beggining to realize this is going to take lots of time and lots of patience. I have to hang out with her more so she can get to know me, the key will be not to mention my past of lack of self confidence, suicide attempts, and gambling....until the time is right. I'm happy to say that I'm not thinking about her all the time, even though I think the love bug is in me.

Regarding gambling, I'm sucking right now. I haven't attempted to stop it nor do I see me doing so in the future. I need a job really bad. I guess the good thing is that it isn't catastrophic. I mean, if I get twenty bucks, I'll buy cigarettes and probably lose five bucks or something. I'm just really bored to be honest, but by saying that I'm making excuses. see ya!