I'm spending too much time inside my own head these days. To much pondering about my newfound "single-hood".
Not that anything bad is going on there, of course, but you start to wonder the wrong things if left up to your own devices.
I begin to wonder if I am ruined for all other women. Am I damaged? Has the experience of these past few months caused emotional baggage that will affect all future relationships? Or will this all, I hope, have made me a better man so that the next woman I decide to share my life with (hopefully THE woman) benefits from how I have grown?
I spend loads of time planning things. Planning my future, deciding where I want to be, and wondering if I'll be there now.because what if I meet someone whose path runs paralell but not to the same destination?
I've begun eating right, working out.I'm rather proud to say I'm now at a weight I havent seen since my 20's. But, is this vanity because I'm single and nobody wants the guy whose soft around his middle.or am I making a life change? I tell myself its the latter.but worry that its the former.
This whole solipsistic thing I've got going on is both exciting and scary.