gothikai

so i'm starting to really doubt my ability to do this whole single mom thing again. i wake up & it's straight to work for me. i hate that. i don't like having to change 2 diapers, dress & feed 2 babies, dress myself, and so on. i barely have time for a fucking shower. i don't think i've had a real clean feeling in days. i have to call my food stamp worker monday & tell her that everything's changed now because gabriel moved out, so that might suck. i don't know if they'll let us get food stamps with no one in the house working...not that i wouldn't love to be working, but i can't afford daycare unless i find a full-time job that pays top dollar & i doubt that's likely to happen. plus i'm not a big fan of daycare (kids get sick all the time & are allowed to play unattended a lot). i am at my wits end. i keep trying to find some way to distract myself, but it's hard because i can't leave kagome &/or katana alone for long. kagome still has a little cold & i woke up feeling all sinus-blocked myself. i can't believe my mom isn't going to be able to babysit for a month or more. i might go insane. seriously. i am not coping well.