gosharkz

I got dumped..peacefully after a three year relationship. It was very cordial. I guess we dont have enough in common and there are differences that are big enough to keep us from being succesfull in the long term. She brought these up- I do not know if I agree, although I need more time to think about things. I hate dating. For now I just want to go out with friends and make new friends but lay low on the whole cliche of dating. If someone I go out for drinks with seems interesing maybe I will break my religion and ask them on a date. I will not waver from my lameness without a fight however. I am grateful that we will be good friends still, maybe best friends. I will have a very empty apartment starting this weekend. My friends always used to ask what the mourning period is when you get out of a long term relationship. I think its hard to say. We broke up on the best of terms. Basicly we could have been happy for the next 1,2,5, etc years but wouldnt work out in the end. That seems to be the prevailing theory. Therefore by breaking up now we are doing each other a favor. I agree in that thinking, I just need a little while longer to figure out if I agree that we wouldnt have worked out eventually. I am coming towards agreeing with her though on a debate team could argue the other way. That said, theres not all that much to mourn per say- Its sad and I am fucked up over this, however on the bright side im going to have a best friend for life still. Maybe some bootie call for the near future. That said maybe we will talk about it and decide to get back. Its not my job to initiate and I respect her decision completely. I tried for two years to get her to be decisive and make decisions- well here is result. Its good still she has come a long way and needs to keep being decisive and stuff. It will make her a stronger person, and if it will be without me day to day then so be it. nullOnly time will tell if we were two mature adults making a mature decision, or two confused fucked up kids that ran away from somthing good. Such a fine line.

Like I said, I hate dating. My first girlfriend I met at a concert and we just kinda starting going that route. Never went on dates just hooked up and chilled. Same with my second girlfriend. Met her at a checkstantd at a supermarket and started chilling. Never dates just chilling. THe relationship that just ended began with us being roomates fucking. Granted I do go on dates, dinner, movies, shows just onces iM together with a person. Lordy, its no suprise that after a year or two or in this case three it seems to come around that I make a better friend. I do have friends with benifits-or I did. I would hope I can shy away from that now. I have slept with more girls than fingers I have. I think i mentioned that to assure everyone that I think I know what I am doing in the sack. LAME! I guess I need to mix up my game and figure out a new MO. I have a lot of problems, I drink to much. Some weed, etc. I cant sleep withought sleeping pills most nights and I have a daily regiment of anti depressents. For ADD. I bounced off walls as a child and got bored in class as a teen. Going out can be fun, but Silence and reading can be golden. Very.

If you read this all the way down and you live here I will buy you a slurpee. If you dont live here then I give you my admiration and most heartfelt thanks.

For sure, the next entry will be short.