goob

I had a minor breakdown last night at work. I freaked out and started crying... it's just all the work I have to do over the next 2 weeks is so overwhelming. End of the semester, too many projects due at once. Not a good thing at a restaurant... I had tables waiting and I was freaking out. Luckily Jason was there to talk to me and help me feel less insane. I love him so much. Some of the people I work with are truly awesome.

I have such a hyperactive personality that I guess I ought to expect a panic attack every once in a while... but it's REALLY not fun when it happens. And I'm completely unmedicated. I know people who owe their sanity to medication, and I respect that choice and see the good it can do... but I just won't accept it for me. I feel like I should be a stronger person... I can survive without the aid of drugs. And most of the time I do.

Okay I gotta stop talking about it and continue my research. Blaaaahhhhh....

The nicest thing to remember is that this feeling won't last. Once the stress time is over, I think hyperactive people like me can have MORE fun than people who don't get anxiety attacks. Something about balance.

Ever have a hyperactive love attack? The kind where you realize your life is so beautiful and you're just so lucky to be alive that you just can't stand it? I get that when I am driving sometimes... when the music is loud and my grin won't stop and I scream out loud because I just can't take the pressure of ecstasy inside me.

Heh... listen to me. I'm a fucking nut.

Oh yeah, my SG hoodie has a fucking hole in it already. Edge of the pocket. That's okay... I can handle it. Needle and thread isn't rocket science.