gonzeaux

Wow, today is the big 38. I think today I will avoid the usual go out and get polluted and just enjoy the quiet. Thats why I moved back to the sticks in the first place.

My friends dad passed away friday night, good for him. He did not suffer and I know from personal experience that cancer really sucks no matter what form it is in.

So it is s somber turning this year. I had dinner with friends friday and they asked why I was not the usual nut ball I am. Cracking jokes and making napkin boobs for the waitress. Who freaked the living hell out of me by singing happy birthday opera style. It was a semi ritzy joint. Which was odd too. I rarely go to them. But she thought the napkin boobs were funny.

This year too has been a dying one for alot of people I have known. It is almost like I have a clean slate in the old friends dept. Od's, cancer, accidents, suicides, almost suicides. I am almost numb. All I can to is be a rock for folks. Thats really all I can do and shell out advice on estate planning. Maybe that is my next vocation. Kind of eerie.

I really need a vacation I think, my studio is keeping me waay to busy. The money is nice but I wanted to work for myself to be a manager of my own time and not have something dictate it. So I don't know. It would be nice to get back east and see some folks in NYC. Maybe some folks in Amsterdam. I was there working with Paul Weller a few years ago and met some loons.

But some time away from the fortress of solitude would be good.......