AND NOW A VERY SPECIAL WINTER SOLSTICE TRIBUTE TO A MOST PERFECT SG BEAUTY!! ANDROMEDA!! 
Woman Swallows Cell Phone After Argument
Saturday, December 24, 2005 4:24 AM EST
The Associated Press
BLUE SPRINGS, Mo. (AP) A lovers' dispute over a cell phone ended suddenly when the woman swallowed the phone whole, police said.
Police said they received a call at 4:52 a.m. Friday from a Blue Springs man who said his girlfriend was having trouble breathing. When they arrived at the house they found the 24-year-old woman had a cell phone lodged in her throat.
"He wanted the phone and she wouldn't give it to him, so she attempted to swallow it," Detective Sgt. Steve Decker of the Blue Springs Police Department. "She just put the entire phone in her mouth so he couldn't get it."
Police said an ambulance transported the woman to St. Mary's Medical Center in Blue Springs. A hospital spokeswoman said she couldn't give details about the woman's health since police have not released her identity.
update 12-30-05
Teen's New Name: KentuckyFriedCruelty.com
Friday, December 30, 2005 4:58 PM EST
The Associated Press
NEW YORK (AP) A 19-year-old PETA staffer has legally changed his name to KentuckyFriedCruelty.com.
Chris Garnett, youth outreach coordinator for the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, said he changed his name in support of the group's anti-KFC campaign.
"People don't believe me at first when I tell them my name, but it never fails to spark a discussion," Garnett, er, KentuckyFriedCruelty.com, said in a statement. "Many vow to boycott KFC after I explain the company's indifference to cruelty to animals."
Norfolk, Va.-based PETA's complaints against KFC stem from video footage shot last year recording alleged mistreatment of birds at a Pilgrim's Pride Corp. plant in Moorefield, W.Va. The plant is a KFC supplier.
Yum! Brands, the parent company of KFC, has disputed the claims of mistreatment. In June, a grand jury refused to indict former workers at the West Virginia chicken plant.
"Stacked" star Pamela Anderson, who has narrated a PETA video showing the alleged abuse, supports Garnett's name change.
"I'm sure Chris can't wait till KFC stops torturing chickens so he can change his name back," the actress said in a statement, adding that the chicken abuse "is awful and has to stop."
On the Net:
www.KentuckyFriedCruelty.com
this one is really funny!!
Pa. Teacher Found Nude Faces Charges
Thursday, December 29, 2005 5:04 PM EST
The Associated Press
HARRISBURG, Pa. (AP) A high school teacher faces charges of assaulting a police officer and possession of illegal drugs after being arrested earlier this month while standing naked in the snow, police said.
Curtis Lofton, 23, was arrested Dec. 10 after police found him nude outside his home. When asked where he lived and why he was naked, Lofton said that he was Jesus Christ and that the officer must be God, according to court papers.
A scuffle broke out between the two men during which Lofton is alleged to have hit the officer over the head with a plastic toy trumpet he found nearby.
Lofton was charged with aggravated assault involving a police officer, resisting arrest, open lewdness, possession of a small amount of marijuana, possession of drug paraphernalia and unlawful possession of the prescription drug oxycodone.
The Central Dauphin School District would not comment on Lofton, a second-year French teacher.
Lofton's attorney, Terrence J. McGowan, said that Lofton's performance reviews have been excellent and that he had an impeccable record as a teacher.
Woman Swallows Cell Phone After Argument
Saturday, December 24, 2005 4:24 AM EST
The Associated Press
BLUE SPRINGS, Mo. (AP) A lovers' dispute over a cell phone ended suddenly when the woman swallowed the phone whole, police said.
Police said they received a call at 4:52 a.m. Friday from a Blue Springs man who said his girlfriend was having trouble breathing. When they arrived at the house they found the 24-year-old woman had a cell phone lodged in her throat.
"He wanted the phone and she wouldn't give it to him, so she attempted to swallow it," Detective Sgt. Steve Decker of the Blue Springs Police Department. "She just put the entire phone in her mouth so he couldn't get it."
Police said an ambulance transported the woman to St. Mary's Medical Center in Blue Springs. A hospital spokeswoman said she couldn't give details about the woman's health since police have not released her identity.
update 12-30-05
Teen's New Name: KentuckyFriedCruelty.com
Friday, December 30, 2005 4:58 PM EST
The Associated Press
NEW YORK (AP) A 19-year-old PETA staffer has legally changed his name to KentuckyFriedCruelty.com.
Chris Garnett, youth outreach coordinator for the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, said he changed his name in support of the group's anti-KFC campaign.
"People don't believe me at first when I tell them my name, but it never fails to spark a discussion," Garnett, er, KentuckyFriedCruelty.com, said in a statement. "Many vow to boycott KFC after I explain the company's indifference to cruelty to animals."
Norfolk, Va.-based PETA's complaints against KFC stem from video footage shot last year recording alleged mistreatment of birds at a Pilgrim's Pride Corp. plant in Moorefield, W.Va. The plant is a KFC supplier.
Yum! Brands, the parent company of KFC, has disputed the claims of mistreatment. In June, a grand jury refused to indict former workers at the West Virginia chicken plant.
"Stacked" star Pamela Anderson, who has narrated a PETA video showing the alleged abuse, supports Garnett's name change.
"I'm sure Chris can't wait till KFC stops torturing chickens so he can change his name back," the actress said in a statement, adding that the chicken abuse "is awful and has to stop."
On the Net:
www.KentuckyFriedCruelty.com
this one is really funny!!
Pa. Teacher Found Nude Faces Charges
Thursday, December 29, 2005 5:04 PM EST
The Associated Press
HARRISBURG, Pa. (AP) A high school teacher faces charges of assaulting a police officer and possession of illegal drugs after being arrested earlier this month while standing naked in the snow, police said.
Curtis Lofton, 23, was arrested Dec. 10 after police found him nude outside his home. When asked where he lived and why he was naked, Lofton said that he was Jesus Christ and that the officer must be God, according to court papers.
A scuffle broke out between the two men during which Lofton is alleged to have hit the officer over the head with a plastic toy trumpet he found nearby.
Lofton was charged with aggravated assault involving a police officer, resisting arrest, open lewdness, possession of a small amount of marijuana, possession of drug paraphernalia and unlawful possession of the prescription drug oxycodone.
The Central Dauphin School District would not comment on Lofton, a second-year French teacher.
Lofton's attorney, Terrence J. McGowan, said that Lofton's performance reviews have been excellent and that he had an impeccable record as a teacher.
VIEW 10 of 10 COMMENTS
drake:
Haha, nobody loves the ladies like you do. Hope you're doing well! 
twinkie:
I wanted to be a snackfood...I don't actually like eating Twinkies. They are supernatural. Plus the whole "yellow on the outside, white in the inside" Twinkie reference amongst the Asian kids. It was too perfect and funny to pass up. I like to amuse myself with trifles.