Thursday Sep 10, 2009

1
I forgot about this feeling... the twisting, the aching, the pounding... I'm definatly not used to this. Break-ups, even if your the one who ended it hurt more than anything. I loved him, I still love him, I probably always will.
BUT i was missing out on so much, the butterflies, the passion, the madly in love part. it wasnt fair any more. and now I am alone, not just at this moment but in the world. Its terrifying. I cant sleep, fuck eating, all i am doing is waiting for the next day to begin and wonder if i can get through it, I need to be in a social setting. BEING alone is only driving me more insane.
Maybe i made a mistake, but is it too much to ask for? not just to love someone but to be IN LOVE with them?
IM A HOT MESS! it hurts, and i know its going to hurt for a while...

i wanna puke
VIEW 13 of 13 COMMENTS
ash:
Awww, poor thing. I just stopped by to see how you've been cuz it's been a while, but I wasn't expecting an update like *this*. Hell, you said it, there's really nothing in the world as painful as a break up, no matter *who* did the breaking. The thing to remember is this: you did the breaking for a reason and you did it while thinking rationally. Right now, you're not thinking rationally, so while u might have thoughts of getting back together to "end" your pain, it would only end for a short while before you become miserable AGAIN. Try to tough it out if you can. There IS such a thing as a mate who will make you feel happy and excited no matter how long you're with them.
gujsel:
hey my fantastic friend for you .......have great christmas......

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a lots of kisses to you kisskisskisskisskisskisskiss

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