glamerdork

Home sweet home
time to stay up all night
looking at the site
surfing round'
catching up on all the new pics
thinkin' bout life and all that jazz
how quick it's flyin by-
every moment is a summers day
long and bright, but gone before you know it-
There is so much on my mind
a thousand unanswered questions
I still dare to ask
already knowing
the answers aren't out there
I-
wonder what the remainder of my life will bring
if I should follow my heart or just give in to logic
-on the flight home today,
I realized that my life is defined by the roles I've played
the shows I've worked on
the people I've been-
the rest is a blur.
On the stage, I make an audience suffer
my talent is somewhere on the level of non-existant
yet I love to be up there-
in front of an audience
making them laugh?
is it that I'm actually being funny,
or do I just look funny?
... it was nice being in the about face holiday show
being on stage with all those talented working actors
singers-
standing up there for the final song
singing as an equal
smiling, cuz I'm proud
and in love with the moment
telling a story-
finally people are listening
it's terrifying.
exhilirating.
no one can interupt
I'm there to let it all out
tell them what's real
be someone
anyone
who isn't me
escape my head
by allowing myself to dig in,
further
and a song-
oh, a simple song-
to sing, to belt my brains out
ala cabaret style I'll seduce the audience
they won't dare look away
my voice, one day, it will sound-
soft yet strong,
sexy yet powerful-
if I could just have one chance
to show em' what I got
to find faith in myself
and just break free
do what I love
not to prove anything to anyone
but just to-
I don't know.
To help a few people smile...
that's all I could ask for
a laugh, a grin, a tear of connection
an excuse to allow myself vunerability-
if only.
if only.