So I'm going to empty out everything because I'm feeling empty. And I really don't care. So yeah.. Be prepared.
SPOILERS! (Click to view)
So I've been thinking a lot. About civilization in general and how I really can't comprehend how most people are as shallow and simple as they are.. I just don't get it. I really have decided that I'm going to pretty much give up on finding anyone with anyone that can really just have the ability to relate to me. There have honestly only been two people in my entire life that I found I could relate to on a whole other level.. Brittany is one of them. She's my "soul sista", monkey girl, crazy little pixie friend.
She's so completely awesome. I've had so many just.. experiences with her for lack of a better word.. She's smart and completely beautiful from her brain to her heart. I love this woman. haha. And secondly, Bobby has been the only other person that could connect with my brain and my soul. WE have had some experiences that I have never felt with another person in my entire life. Something beyond sex and whatevthefuck people think is normal in a relationship.. and surpassed it all. I felt a connection with these two human BEINGS, weather or not they are considered my lover or my friend, I felt a TRUE connection to a living thing. And now I feel nothing. I feel like I'm being fucked by my school and credit union. I feel like I can't find a job and yay I get to go back to dancing. I feel annoyed by everyone around me. I feel like trudging through life is getting really fucking repetitive. And I've felt this way since I don't even remember. Likeeeeee maybe 9th grade. That's a 6 year funk. Wow. How much longer can it go on seriously? I don't understand why my mind works the way it works. All I know is that I do love something. And I do have a passion. And it's art. That's the only thing I really care about. I'm your typical starving artist. haha But I feel like school is just a waste of time. I feel like more often than not, I could be teaching the class no fucking joke. It's insane. Maybe I just had really difficult classes and teachers in Texas? Because GODDAMNNNN these professors at my school are really lax on everything.. I made a C in my drawing class and I only finished one single piece out of 6. He gave me A's on unfinished work and taught me nothing. If I would have done this in my AP HIGH SCHOOL class from senior year Mrs. Lattuzio would have punted me out into the hallway and would say "go back to drawing 1".
So. There's that.
And I'm hungry.
So I've been thinking a lot. About civilization in general and how I really can't comprehend how most people are as shallow and simple as they are.. I just don't get it. I really have decided that I'm going to pretty much give up on finding anyone with anyone that can really just have the ability to relate to me. There have honestly only been two people in my entire life that I found I could relate to on a whole other level.. Brittany is one of them. She's my "soul sista", monkey girl, crazy little pixie friend.
She's so completely awesome. I've had so many just.. experiences with her for lack of a better word.. She's smart and completely beautiful from her brain to her heart. I love this woman. haha. And secondly, Bobby has been the only other person that could connect with my brain and my soul. WE have had some experiences that I have never felt with another person in my entire life. Something beyond sex and whatevthefuck people think is normal in a relationship.. and surpassed it all. I felt a connection with these two human BEINGS, weather or not they are considered my lover or my friend, I felt a TRUE connection to a living thing. And now I feel nothing. I feel like I'm being fucked by my school and credit union. I feel like I can't find a job and yay I get to go back to dancing. I feel annoyed by everyone around me. I feel like trudging through life is getting really fucking repetitive. And I've felt this way since I don't even remember. Likeeeeee maybe 9th grade. That's a 6 year funk. Wow. How much longer can it go on seriously? I don't understand why my mind works the way it works. All I know is that I do love something. And I do have a passion. And it's art. That's the only thing I really care about. I'm your typical starving artist. haha But I feel like school is just a waste of time. I feel like more often than not, I could be teaching the class no fucking joke. It's insane. Maybe I just had really difficult classes and teachers in Texas? Because GODDAMNNNN these professors at my school are really lax on everything.. I made a C in my drawing class and I only finished one single piece out of 6. He gave me A's on unfinished work and taught me nothing. If I would have done this in my AP HIGH SCHOOL class from senior year Mrs. Lattuzio would have punted me out into the hallway and would say "go back to drawing 1".
So. There's that.
And I'm hungry.