hmmm i imagine it's epiphany day.. good thing too b/c i was starting to wonder.. 
so where to start eh? well i guess i'll just start from the middle. seeing as how no one does that. who knows what the middle is anyway?
i'm never again going to assume that i'm anything other than what i am. i'm no fucking saint. i'm not innocent. i'm not bog's greatest gift to humans and animals alike.. i'm fucking vicious. get it straight and don't forget it. this is who i am. i may have lost a lot of sight of who i was for a long time. but for the first time in a long time.. i actually know who i am and what i want. more than anyone will ever know. i may not always get what i want.. but i'll fucking try to the death.
life is about change and gravity is catching up. who knows what tomorrow will bring? ANYTHING I FUCKING WANT IT TO BRING.. that's what. and if i work hard enough and put enough of my soul into it.. i just might actually get it. i'm starting to understand what things are like in the real world.. and yeah. i'm really young. i'm only 20. i'm through with claiming that i'm not a child anymore.. yeah i've been through a lot but who the fuck hasn't?! and there's still a lot more to learn. from different people. and maybe people can learn from me. if they choose to listen. i can't force them to.. and i won't.
i refuse to keep my mouth shut. i refuse to lay down. i refuse to pull the plug. i will constantly question and learn. i will fucking accomplish what i want without a crutch. my first instinct will be my own. i will not be anyone's pet, nor will anyone be my own. and yes. everything will be different. but that's the goal. i'm through with trying to live in the past. nostalgia makes me fucking sick to my stomach.. being a victim is disgusting.
so fucking be my friend or don't.. either way i don't give a shit. love me or loathe me. i won't play games anymore. because right now.. in my head, i won't even consider. haaaaaa. there's so much more i want to say. but i think i've proven a point. and now i'm reaching for something i came sorta close to and then never finished. but i won't settle for anything short of what i dream of. and maybe it'll work and if it doesn't.. then FUCKING CHALK IT UP. haha my mom told me that one time. there's something to be learned from your elders..
so there's my two cents. watch me grow. and sprout. from my mind, to my body, to my soul.. and back again. constantly regrowing and resprouting. I AM THE FUCKING SNIPER AT THE GATES. i grow more powerful by the day. i can be anything that i want to be. and no i may not be beautiful or unique.. but i'll fucking be who i am. and i will listen to what you have to say if it's worth my time.. and if you're not worth my time then start fuckin steppin. and get the fuck out of my face. yes i'm hardened and yes i'm fucking bitter. but i liked myself a whole lot more than when i was. haha. weakness will get you no where. 'cept last place, that is.. heh.
so where to start eh? well i guess i'll just start from the middle. seeing as how no one does that. who knows what the middle is anyway?
i'm never again going to assume that i'm anything other than what i am. i'm no fucking saint. i'm not innocent. i'm not bog's greatest gift to humans and animals alike.. i'm fucking vicious. get it straight and don't forget it. this is who i am. i may have lost a lot of sight of who i was for a long time. but for the first time in a long time.. i actually know who i am and what i want. more than anyone will ever know. i may not always get what i want.. but i'll fucking try to the death.
life is about change and gravity is catching up. who knows what tomorrow will bring? ANYTHING I FUCKING WANT IT TO BRING.. that's what. and if i work hard enough and put enough of my soul into it.. i just might actually get it. i'm starting to understand what things are like in the real world.. and yeah. i'm really young. i'm only 20. i'm through with claiming that i'm not a child anymore.. yeah i've been through a lot but who the fuck hasn't?! and there's still a lot more to learn. from different people. and maybe people can learn from me. if they choose to listen. i can't force them to.. and i won't.
i refuse to keep my mouth shut. i refuse to lay down. i refuse to pull the plug. i will constantly question and learn. i will fucking accomplish what i want without a crutch. my first instinct will be my own. i will not be anyone's pet, nor will anyone be my own. and yes. everything will be different. but that's the goal. i'm through with trying to live in the past. nostalgia makes me fucking sick to my stomach.. being a victim is disgusting.
so fucking be my friend or don't.. either way i don't give a shit. love me or loathe me. i won't play games anymore. because right now.. in my head, i won't even consider. haaaaaa. there's so much more i want to say. but i think i've proven a point. and now i'm reaching for something i came sorta close to and then never finished. but i won't settle for anything short of what i dream of. and maybe it'll work and if it doesn't.. then FUCKING CHALK IT UP. haha my mom told me that one time. there's something to be learned from your elders..
so there's my two cents. watch me grow. and sprout. from my mind, to my body, to my soul.. and back again. constantly regrowing and resprouting. I AM THE FUCKING SNIPER AT THE GATES. i grow more powerful by the day. i can be anything that i want to be. and no i may not be beautiful or unique.. but i'll fucking be who i am. and i will listen to what you have to say if it's worth my time.. and if you're not worth my time then start fuckin steppin. and get the fuck out of my face. yes i'm hardened and yes i'm fucking bitter. but i liked myself a whole lot more than when i was. haha. weakness will get you no where. 'cept last place, that is.. heh.
