I've had a pretty depressing week.
Less than a week after I returned from visiting all my family in PA one of my grandma's got very sick.My father and I got on a plane and while we were on our way she passed.I am a freakin mess!!! And, it turns out that my family on that side lacks respect.Long story, but some were digging around her room for things even before the wake.My grandma and I were VERY close.I love her soooo much and have soooo many good memories.I'm going to miss her.I'm also worried about my grandpap being alone now.
This blog I'm typing dosen't paint a true picture of how hurt I am now and how bad I feel inside.
Another thing that ills me is...I'm dealing with a mixed up relationship.I've had a number of great dates, fun times and crushes but I have a hard crush on one particular guy.I know I'm not ready to commit and he travels for long periods of time for work.We don't get a lot of time together.I thought he digged me too by the things he's done for me and the things he's said.But, he said something yesterday that was just stupid to say out loud to me.We were watching tv and he said he wanted to be some girls underpants.What the fuck?Even if we're to be friends w/ benifits why say that?It hurt me.I told him a little while ago I just wanted to be friends, but now I can't do that.With him, I just keep liking him more every time we're together.I don't think he's into me the way I'm into him anyhow.I just have to move on.I hope we can some day be friends with out glitches.I want to hang out and do disney and snowboard w/ him still. *smile*
God, I'm a high school girl mess right now. teehee.I could go on forever.
Less than a week after I returned from visiting all my family in PA one of my grandma's got very sick.My father and I got on a plane and while we were on our way she passed.I am a freakin mess!!! And, it turns out that my family on that side lacks respect.Long story, but some were digging around her room for things even before the wake.My grandma and I were VERY close.I love her soooo much and have soooo many good memories.I'm going to miss her.I'm also worried about my grandpap being alone now.
This blog I'm typing dosen't paint a true picture of how hurt I am now and how bad I feel inside.
Another thing that ills me is...I'm dealing with a mixed up relationship.I've had a number of great dates, fun times and crushes but I have a hard crush on one particular guy.I know I'm not ready to commit and he travels for long periods of time for work.We don't get a lot of time together.I thought he digged me too by the things he's done for me and the things he's said.But, he said something yesterday that was just stupid to say out loud to me.We were watching tv and he said he wanted to be some girls underpants.What the fuck?Even if we're to be friends w/ benifits why say that?It hurt me.I told him a little while ago I just wanted to be friends, but now I can't do that.With him, I just keep liking him more every time we're together.I don't think he's into me the way I'm into him anyhow.I just have to move on.I hope we can some day be friends with out glitches.I want to hang out and do disney and snowboard w/ him still. *smile*
God, I'm a high school girl mess right now. teehee.I could go on forever.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
martini79:
mmmm, Macro and Cheese....
pelirojo:
my gramma has stories about her mother's wake and some of her cyblings (7) taking stuff of the walls. I asked my two friends if they would throw a party and burn my house down with all my shit in it after I die. I really don't know what kind of relationship I'm in. I know i love her and not having a label makes it feel more special rather than less. I'm going to disneyland the 29th and with all of the memories of that place (more recently bad) hopefully this well be a more postive one in the ol' memory machine. 