I am back! I have returned from my self-imposed exile in a little town called Chesnee, SC, and I'm back in Spartanburg, back in school, back at work, and ready to take on the challenges that life continues to throw my way.
As you probably imagined, Thea's death has proven to be a major turning point in my life. After she was so suddenly and brutally taken from me, I had to take a step back and re-evaluate everything I had taken for granted thus far. To that end, I moved out of the hotel in which I was staying at the time and moved in with Gina's family in a little town about 25 km away from here. I kept my iguana, my car, my clothes, and my job, but very little else. Being depressed as I was causes you to do some strange things, I guess. All I know is, I had to separate myself from all the trivial things to which I was devoting so much time and money so I could decide what's really important in life. I just needed to take a little time to mourn her loss and decide once again what I really wanted to accomplish in this life.
To that end, I think I came out a winner in more ways than one. For one thing, I've lost a lot of weight (from a slovenly 105 kg back down to a svelte 93 kg) and am in the best shape I've been in in years. I saved a lot of money during my sabbatical, which I have since used to get a brand-new apartment in Spartanburg with all new furniture. I'm back in school now, taking four political science courses and one African history course. I'm still working at Bed Bath and Beyond, only now I'm getting far more hours than before, which of course means a larger paycheck as well. I've decided to quit trying to run from my destiny and have jumped back into the political game full-time--anyone else going to the anti-war protest in D.C. on the 24th? Oh, and by the way...I got a little black kitten named Cletus with whom to share all my coming adventures, too.
Yes, in the final analysis, Thea's death was a real tragedy. But the best way to memorialize her life is to go on and make the difference that she never had the chance to make. Thea was one of those rare people who had so much zest for life she couldn't help but affect everyone around her. My only hope is that I, in my own way, can make that much of a difference in the lives of others as well.
As I wrote to another friend back home recently:
"Well, at least I escaped Barnwell (again.) After an extended hiatus, I'm back in college, this time at USC-Upstate, where I'm majoring in political science. I'm living in a little one-bedroom apartment in Spartanburg which I share with a little black kitten named Cletus, a surly green iguana named Jinx, and three houseplants that are very good listeners. I'm working at Bed Bath and Beyond at the Westgate Mall to finance my decadent lifestyle, in which I have no wife, no kids, no mortgage, and no worries. Yet.
"But what a long, strange trip it's been to get me here. It started at Erskine College in Due West, then meandered to Hilton Head Island, Bluffton, back to Hilton Head Island, then on to Bonneau, North Charleston, Mt. Pleasant, and then back to Barnwell. From there I wandered to Spartanburg, Chesnee, and now back to Spartanburg again. Gypsy life isn't easy, especially for a pack rat like me...hopefully I can stay here for a little while longer.
"During this journey I've worked at a variety of menial jobs at restaurants, coffee shops, smoothie bars, grocery stores, gas stations, sporting goods stores, and garages. I even moved furniture for a living at one point. Basically, if you can think of a job that requires no education and no practical experience, then odds are that I've held it at one point. I've lived everywhere from swank three-story houses in Sea Pines to a trailer park on the shore of Lake Moultrie, including a few stints where I 'lived' in the back seat of a 1986 Oldsmobile Cutlass Supreme.
"Yet despite it all, I wouldn't have traded the experience for anything. I've experienced the best--and the worst--that life here in these United States has to offer. I've made a lot of new friends (and a few enemies as well.) I've traveled all over the East Coast from Florida to Toronto. I've learned how to cook, sail, fish, and surf. I've worked on political campaigns, organized grass-roots movements, and marched in protests. I've been lauded by politicians, chased by security guards, and photographed by Secret Service agents (multiple times!) I've studied the whole spectrum of cultures, religions, and philosophies, usually under the tutelage of actual practitioners of those beliefs. Along the way, I've learned that the petty differences we use to keep us separate are nothing compared to the hopes, dreams, and motivations that ultimately bring us all together. And somewhere along the way, I actually managed to find myself.
"So where do I go from here? Who knows? I have about another year and a half to go until I get my degree, after which I'll be off again, sailing wherever the winds of fate take me. I could never have imagined that my life would have taken me in the direction that it has thus far, nor can I imagine where it may go from here. All I know is that, finally, I'm genuinely happy with who I am and can't wait to get involved in my next big adventure. To paraphrase the great Jimmy Buffett, 'Yesterdays are over my shoulder, so I can't look back for too long. There's just too much to see waiting in front of me, and I know that I just can't go wrong!'"
Yes, it's good to be back. I've missed you all!
Oh, and Cletus says hey, too.
"I subscribe to SuicideGirls for the same reason I read National Geographic. With both I get to see beautiful, exotic places that I'll never actually get to visit." --GiddyIguana
As you probably imagined, Thea's death has proven to be a major turning point in my life. After she was so suddenly and brutally taken from me, I had to take a step back and re-evaluate everything I had taken for granted thus far. To that end, I moved out of the hotel in which I was staying at the time and moved in with Gina's family in a little town about 25 km away from here. I kept my iguana, my car, my clothes, and my job, but very little else. Being depressed as I was causes you to do some strange things, I guess. All I know is, I had to separate myself from all the trivial things to which I was devoting so much time and money so I could decide what's really important in life. I just needed to take a little time to mourn her loss and decide once again what I really wanted to accomplish in this life.
To that end, I think I came out a winner in more ways than one. For one thing, I've lost a lot of weight (from a slovenly 105 kg back down to a svelte 93 kg) and am in the best shape I've been in in years. I saved a lot of money during my sabbatical, which I have since used to get a brand-new apartment in Spartanburg with all new furniture. I'm back in school now, taking four political science courses and one African history course. I'm still working at Bed Bath and Beyond, only now I'm getting far more hours than before, which of course means a larger paycheck as well. I've decided to quit trying to run from my destiny and have jumped back into the political game full-time--anyone else going to the anti-war protest in D.C. on the 24th? Oh, and by the way...I got a little black kitten named Cletus with whom to share all my coming adventures, too.
Yes, in the final analysis, Thea's death was a real tragedy. But the best way to memorialize her life is to go on and make the difference that she never had the chance to make. Thea was one of those rare people who had so much zest for life she couldn't help but affect everyone around her. My only hope is that I, in my own way, can make that much of a difference in the lives of others as well.
As I wrote to another friend back home recently:
"Well, at least I escaped Barnwell (again.) After an extended hiatus, I'm back in college, this time at USC-Upstate, where I'm majoring in political science. I'm living in a little one-bedroom apartment in Spartanburg which I share with a little black kitten named Cletus, a surly green iguana named Jinx, and three houseplants that are very good listeners. I'm working at Bed Bath and Beyond at the Westgate Mall to finance my decadent lifestyle, in which I have no wife, no kids, no mortgage, and no worries. Yet.
"But what a long, strange trip it's been to get me here. It started at Erskine College in Due West, then meandered to Hilton Head Island, Bluffton, back to Hilton Head Island, then on to Bonneau, North Charleston, Mt. Pleasant, and then back to Barnwell. From there I wandered to Spartanburg, Chesnee, and now back to Spartanburg again. Gypsy life isn't easy, especially for a pack rat like me...hopefully I can stay here for a little while longer.
"During this journey I've worked at a variety of menial jobs at restaurants, coffee shops, smoothie bars, grocery stores, gas stations, sporting goods stores, and garages. I even moved furniture for a living at one point. Basically, if you can think of a job that requires no education and no practical experience, then odds are that I've held it at one point. I've lived everywhere from swank three-story houses in Sea Pines to a trailer park on the shore of Lake Moultrie, including a few stints where I 'lived' in the back seat of a 1986 Oldsmobile Cutlass Supreme.
"Yet despite it all, I wouldn't have traded the experience for anything. I've experienced the best--and the worst--that life here in these United States has to offer. I've made a lot of new friends (and a few enemies as well.) I've traveled all over the East Coast from Florida to Toronto. I've learned how to cook, sail, fish, and surf. I've worked on political campaigns, organized grass-roots movements, and marched in protests. I've been lauded by politicians, chased by security guards, and photographed by Secret Service agents (multiple times!) I've studied the whole spectrum of cultures, religions, and philosophies, usually under the tutelage of actual practitioners of those beliefs. Along the way, I've learned that the petty differences we use to keep us separate are nothing compared to the hopes, dreams, and motivations that ultimately bring us all together. And somewhere along the way, I actually managed to find myself.
"So where do I go from here? Who knows? I have about another year and a half to go until I get my degree, after which I'll be off again, sailing wherever the winds of fate take me. I could never have imagined that my life would have taken me in the direction that it has thus far, nor can I imagine where it may go from here. All I know is that, finally, I'm genuinely happy with who I am and can't wait to get involved in my next big adventure. To paraphrase the great Jimmy Buffett, 'Yesterdays are over my shoulder, so I can't look back for too long. There's just too much to see waiting in front of me, and I know that I just can't go wrong!'"
Yes, it's good to be back. I've missed you all!
Oh, and Cletus says hey, too.
"I subscribe to SuicideGirls for the same reason I read National Geographic. With both I get to see beautiful, exotic places that I'll never actually get to visit." --GiddyIguana
love:
Goodness gracious!!! Am I glad to see you back. I've missed your journals. 