ghostina

i've been staring at this little box for five minutes now... i feel as if i have so much to say, yet i don't know how to say it. not even really deep thoughts or old crazy journal entries..

apparently my curse here is that i am not a poet.

it is strange working with your best friend..even stranger when she is theoretically your boss. i love working alongside someone that i already know like the back of my hand, but it also makes it hard sometimes. i suppose i feel like sometimes she thinks i don't know anything at all...get talked at like i'm five years old.

of course, that day i was especially moody from too many ephedra pills combined with antidepressants.

anyway...this weekend has been a huge dissapointment and a bore. i wanted to go dancing so very badly...*sigh*

she'll never go...

on thursday (the moody cranky day)..our boss let us borrow her car so we wouldn't have to take the bus(she's so nice!) ...on the way home i realized i didn't have a key to get in my house, i just wanted to get away from everyone at that moment. traffic took us over an hour to get home...no cigarettes allowed. i wanted to scream and hurt someone!

i failed to break into my house..no windows or doors unlocked...left by the side of the road...alone...freezing cold. i climbed up the two story deck, sat and shivered in the dark ghetto where i live. i'd never felt more alone in my life...

but i did not cry.

i guess alone is where i thought i wanted to be...

Anyway..enough of this horseshit. today is my uncle chief's birthday...so i'm meeting my relatives for sonny's barbecue...how funny! and i am going to target and big lots and to a coworkers jewelry show!
i just hope i don't have to go alone.